经典句子摘录 (评论: 懒人懒思录)

　　谈吃论喝
　　他带着恩赐的神情低头看着那些苍白而饥饿的面孔，对自己说：“与我相比，你们是多么快乐啊！”体态臃肿的老绅士高声谈论贫穷之于富有的优越性，这太令他感到安慰了。头痛会使人马上忘记心痛。手指的疼痛会驱走对一张空椅子的回忆。当一个人真正觉得饥饿时，他感觉不到其他事物。
　　On Eating and Drinking
　　Who looks down patronizingly at some poor devil with a white starved face and thinks to himself, “Ah,how happy you are compared with me!” － so soothing to the fat gentleman who crackle about the superority of poverty over riches. But it is all nonse － all cant. An aching head soon makes one forget an aching heart. A broken finger will drive away all recollection of an empty chair. And when a man feels really hungry, he does not feel anything else.
　　
　　爱情常在，生命不老
　　不论是高的女人还是矮的女人，黑皮肤的还是白皮肤的，开朗的还是忧郁的，我都喜欢。别责备我，女士们，错在你们。每一位头脑正常的男子都是博爱者，他怎么可能不是呢？环肥燕瘦，每一个都是如此迷人。男人的心很大。亲爱的读者，你不会知道男人的心有多大：那是他的烦恼，有时也是你们的烦恼。
　　On The Preparation And Employment Of Love Philters
　　I like tall woman and short,dark woman and fair,merry woman and grave. Do not blame me, Ladies,the fault lies with you. Every right-thinking man is a universal lover; how could it be otherwise? You are so diverse, yet each charming of your kind; and a man’s heart is large. You have no adea, fair reader, how large aman’s heart is: that is his trouble, — sometimes yours.
　　
　　阿猫阿狗
　　要找同伴的话，它们可比人类强多了。它们不会和你争吵。当你在谈论自己的时候，它们只是聆听，从不谈起它们自己，并显出对谈话很感兴趣的样子。它们从不发布愚蠢的见解。它们从不说不客气的话，它们从不挑我们的毛病，还打着“为了我们好”的旗号。它们从不会在不恰当的时候温和地提起我们过去所犯的蠢事和错误。
　　On Cats And Dogs
　　They are much superior to human beings as companions. They do not quarrel or argue with you. They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation. They never make stupid remarks. They never say unkind things. They never tell us of our faults, “merely for our own good”. They do not at inconvenient moments mildly remind us of our past folles and mistakes.
　　
　　闲散的真谛
　　世界上有许多懒人，也有无数慢吞吞的人，但是真正的闲散之人却是稀有珍品。他不是那种整天游手好闲的人。正相反，他最惊人的特点就是他总是忙得不可开交。除非有一大堆工作要做，否则是不能彻底享受闲散的。在无所事事中没有乐趣可言。浪费时间只是一种职业，而且事最让人精疲力竭的职业。闲散，如同接吻，必须是偷来的才够甜蜜。
　　On Being Idle
　　There are plenty of lazy people and plenty of slow-coaches, but a genuine idler is a rarity. He is not a man who slouches about with his hands in his pockets. On the contrary, his most startling characteristic is that he is always intensely busy. It’s impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do. There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do. Wasting time is merely an occupation then, and a most exhausting one. Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen.
　　
　　呵护以及驾驭女人
　　别给她时间对你挑三拣四，一直让她习惯你为止。没有人可以忍受赤裸裸地暴露在一个年轻姑娘的眼皮下。蜜月就是婚姻的显微镜。摇晃它，用各种物体将它搅乱，用其他有趣的东西遮盖它。可别呆呆地坐在那儿接受检验。另外，你得记住男人越是忙乱就越能达到最佳状态，女人则正好相反。我的孩子，你要让她忙个不停，让她眼花缭乱。
　　On The Care And Management Of Woman
　　Don’t give her time to criticize you until she has got used to you. No man will bear unprotected exposure to a young girl’s eyes. The honeymoon is a matrimonial microscope. Wobble it. Confuse it with many objects. Cloud it with other intersts. Don’t sit still be examined. Besides, remember that a man always appears at his best when active, and a woman at her worst. Bustle her, my dear boy, bustle her.
　　
　　羞怯趣谈
　　实际上，害羞之人每次都逃不过被人误解的命运；无论他努力要给别人留下什么样的印象，总是适得其反。他讲笑话事总显得牵强附会，他想表现的真实可信却遭到诸多责难。人们从字面上来理解来他的讽刺嘲讽，认为那是他真正的观点，送给他傻瓜的名号。可反过来，如果他想趋炎附势，冒险说些阿谀奉承之词，别人又会以为他冷嘲热讽，从而记恨他一辈子。
　　On Being Shy
　　But, indeed, to be misunderstood is the shy man’s fate on every occasion; and whatever impression he endeavors to creat, he is sure to convey its opposite. When he makes a joke, it is looked upon as a pretended relation of fact and his want of veracity much condemned. His sarcasm is accepted as his literal opinion and gains for him the reputation of being an ass, while if, on the other hand, wishing to ingratiate himselg, he ventures upon a little bit of flattery, it is taken for satire and he is hated ever afterward.
　　
　　带家具的寓所
　　要是这些木头木脑的老家伙可以选择开口说话，它们会讲出多少奇妙的故事啊！它们参与了多少出人意外的人生悲喜剧呢！那旧沙发垫上曾浸润了多少苦涩的眼泪！那把长椅偷听过多少激情的悄悄话！与旧家具相比，新家具对我来说毫无魅力。我们喜爱的都是旧东西——旧的面孔、旧的书本、旧的笑话。新家具营造出来的是一所宫殿，而旧家具才造就一个家。
　　On Furnished Apartment
　　What strange tales the wooden-headed old fellows could tell did they but choose to speak! At what unsuspected comedies and trangedies have they not missed! What bitter tears have been sobbed into that old sofa cushion! What passionate whisperings the setee must have overheard. New furnitures has no charms for me compared with old. It is the old things that we love － the old faces, the old books, the old jokes. New furniture can make a palace, but it takes old furniture to make a home.
　　
　　婴儿妙谈
　　世界啊——这小小的圆圆的的世界啊！在婴儿的眼里它肯定到处是浩瀚神秘之地！后花园是一片人迹罕至的陆地！他们在楼下的地窖拉力进行多么不可思议的探险！他们带着一直怎样的敬畏去凝视那长长的街道啊！他们肯定想知道何处是尽头，如同我们大人抬头仰望天空一样。可怜的小脚才踏上冷酷的旅程！我们旅途中的倦客，只能在路的那头远远的朝你挥挥手。
　　On Babies
　　The world － the small round world! What a vast mysterious place it must seem to baby eyes! What a trackless contient the back garden apears! What marvelous explorations they make in the cellar under the stairs! With what awe they gaze down the long street wondering, like us bigger babies when we gaze up at the stars, where it all ends! Poor little feet, just commencing the stony journey! We old travelers, far down the road, can only pause to wave a hand to you.
　　
　　坠入爱河
　　你肯定恋爱过！如果还没有，你会恋爱的。恋爱如同麻疹：我们都要经历一次。它也像麻疹一样，得过一次便终身免疫，永远不会担心会再次染上。人的心是烟花，只能向着天空燃放一次。宛若流星一般，片刻燃烧，余光坠下。然后我们肮脏而卑微生活的黑夜笼罩住它，燃尽的烟火归于尘土，毫无用处，无人在意，慢慢地化为灰烬。
　　On Being In Love
　　You’ve been in love, of course! If not you’ve got it to come. Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it. Also like the measles, we take it only once. One never need be afraid of catching it a second time. A man’s heart is a firework that once in its time flashes heavenward. Meteor-like, it blazes for a moment and lights with its glory the whole world beneath. Then the night of our sordidi commonplace life closes in around it, and the burned-out case, falling back to earth, lies useless and uncared for, slowly smoldering into ashes.
　　
　　万物皆虚荣
　　虚荣心是推动人心的真正动力，而奉承是轮子的润滑剂。要想在这个世界赢得好感会尊重，你必须溜须拍马。向所有的人献媚，无论贵贱，不分贫富，管他是愚蠢还是聪明，你将变得八面玲珑。赞扬这个人的美德，也歌颂那个人的恶行，人无彼此，事无大小，你都要一一恭维，特别是那些他们不具备的品德。这样的话，你的眼力和智慧就会被捧上天。
　　On Vanity And Vanities
　　Vanity is truly the motive-power that moves humanity, and it is flattery that greases the wheels. If you want to win affection and respect in this world, you must flatter people. Flatter high and low, and rich and poor, and silly and wise. You will get on famously. Praise this man’s virtures and that man’s vices. Compliment everybody on everything, and especially upon what they haven’t got. Your discernment and intelligence will be extolled to the skies.
　　
　　趣论三思而行
　　我听说有个年轻人择妻时真是千挑万选。他非常明智地告诉自己：“男人挑选妻子一定要谨慎小心。”他告诫自己说，女人应该是生活中的好帮手。她具有一个女人所具有的一切美德，完美无瑕，总之一句话，她十全十美，他娶了她，发现她与自己期望的一样。他只有一点不满意——他并不喜欢她。当然，错不在她。
　　On The Time Wasted In Looking Before One Leaps
　　I have been told of a young man, who chose his wife with excellent care. Said he to himself, very wisely, “In the selection of a wife a man cannot be too circumspect.” He convinced himself that the girl was everything a helpmate should be. She had every virtue that could be expected in a woman. Speaking practically, she was perfection. He married her, and found she was all he had thought her. Only one thing could he urge against her － that he did not like her. And that, of course, was not her fault.
　　
　　排除万难，下定决心
　　我是什么？我是一个伟大的绅士，带着一颗勇往直前的心，昂首挺胸地行走于人世间，嘲讽一切鄙俗之事，唾弃一切卑鄙小人。可我只是一个自私小气又胆小怕事的俗人（正是那个昂首挺胸勇往直前的“我”所鄙视的那类人），绕到而行，朝着卑微的目标爬行，遇到强敌就退缩，碰到困难则胆怯。
　　On The Art Of Making Up One’s Mind
　　What am I? I am a great gentleman, walking through the world with dauntless heart and head erect, scornful of all meanness,impatient of all littleness. I am a mean-thinking, little daring man － the type of man that I of the dauntless heart and erect head despise greatly － crawling to a poor end by devious way, cringing to the strong timid of all pain.