七步：内向害羞的你也能成为网络社交达人

七步 – 内向害羞的你也能成为网络社交达人

 

Put your hand up if you are an introvert.

Now put your hand up if you love social networking: twitter, Facebook, google+, Linkedin and the like ..

先请内向的人举起您的手.

现在,如果您热爱诸如推特(twitter)、脸书(Facebook)、谷歌(google+) 、邻客音(Linkedin)之类的社交网络，请举起您的手来。

My sentiments exactly!

我的想法一点没错！

I used to be like that. The key word being USED TO.

过去的我就是那样的，请注意是“过去”。

First of all, let me assure you, I am still very much an introvert. I prefer to stay behind the camera and do my work, thanks very much. Put me in a room full of people, and you would most probably find me in a corner, talking to a close friend.

首先，相信我，我仍然还是一个很内向的人。通常我宁愿避开照相机，埋头工作，拜托不要把我拉到镜头前了。如果一间屋里满是客人，那么很可能你会发现我躲在一个小角落里，和自己熟识的朋友聊天。

Many writers – and bloggers can relate to this. Sadly, this is not very good news. If you are in any sort of writing, publishing, blogging business, you need to put yourself out there.

很多作家和博主都有这样的情况。可是，这不是个很好的消息。如果你正在从事写作、出版、商业博客类的工作，你需要走出这种境况。

As difficult as it may sound, you have to get out of your comfort zone, because this is doing precisely that. Your blog is not an island. You can’t build it by yourself. You need to find people who really connect with and form meaningful relationships.

离开自己的舒适区，这听起来难，做起来更难。你的博客不是一个孤岛，没法独力去建设。你需要找到那些真正有共同点的人，建立有建设性意义的人际关系。

When I went to the problogger training event, I was really nervous. Not about the conference; the talks and the workshop, I was really looking forward to it.

当我去“领先博客培训”时， 我真的很紧张。不是因为为讨论会、谈话和课程，这些都是我一直心存期待的。

The 2-hour networking event AFTER the conference, that had been scaring the hell out of me. I hardly knew anyone there. ‘What would I say?’, ‘Who can I talk to?’ I spent much time agonizing over that. And yes it was hard, in the beginning, but then as few people approached me, I began to relax. Hang on, that is not too difficult, after all, these people are bloggers too and they are also here to learn and meet other bloggers.

但是会后有两小时的网络社交，这吓坏了我。 那里的人我几乎都不认识，“我该说些什么？”，“同谁去说？”，我为这些问题苦恼了很长时间。开始这确实很难，但是一会儿就有一些人来找我了，我开始放松下来。坚持一下，并不困难，毕竟，这些人也是写博客的，而且他们也是来这里学习和认识其它博主的。

That’s all I am saying, networking can be a lot of fun when you are talking to people in your industry. If you are clear on what is it that you want to accomplish, it can become very rewarding.

这就是我想说的，当你去与同领域的人谈话，网络社交会给你带来很多的乐趣。如果你很清楚你想要得到什么，你也能得到丰厚的回报。

Do you feel that despite having all your knowledge of networking, you are too shy to be active on social media sites?

你有没有觉得不管你有多少网络社交的知识，在社交媒体网络你仍然由于过于羞涩而活跃不起来？

You are an introvert. That’s fine, I am one too and in many ways we have an advantage over ‘in your face’ kinda people.

你是个内向的人， 这没问题， 我也是个内向的人，在很多方面我们优于那些 “过于耀眼”社交达人。

The idea that only outgoing people can establish relationships with others is not true. As an introvert, you have strengths that you can use which will work well with your personality. Here are some Social Networking Tips for writers and bloggers who also happen to be introverts

那些认为只有外向的人才能认识朋友的观点是不对的。做为一个内向的人，你有自己的能力来弥补性格上的不足。以下有些网络社交贴士适用于那些内向的作家和博主。

1. Give yourself Permission to Network

Networking is not a bad word. Networking is as much about nurturing as it is about meeting people. It is our people skills, courtesy and developing connections.

You might have heard, in business, it’s not what you do, but who you know. As much as I used to dislike this line, now I have come to understand that, I can still be me and make it work – for all parties. All I need to do is be genuinely interested in people, helping them out and giving as much if not more, before asking anything.

1．允许自己进行网络社交

网络社交并不是个坏事。这是我们人类的技能、礼貌和并用来发展社会关系。

你也许听说过，在生意场上，起关键作用的不是你做了什么，而是你认识什么人。尽管过去我曾非常抵制这种说法， 现在我却开始逐渐能理解了，我能仍然坚持自己的原则，还同时兼顾各方利益。我所需要做的就是真诚地关注别人，帮助他们，如果不能完全满足就尽力做。在向别人索取之前我们需要先付出。

2. Be a Great Listener

Being an introvert, you might already excel at this. If you rather let others do the talking, then that’s great. It shows respect towards that person. You can also find the right time to speak – never interrupting or being overly aggressive. Play up to your strengths. Listen twice as much as you talk.

2．做一个好的听众

作为一个内向的人，这方面你可能已经表现得很好了。如果你是心甘情愿别人说你听，那很棒。这表达了你对别人的尊重。你也可以找恰当的时间说话-不要打断别人说话或者过于激进。发挥你自己的长处， 多听少说。

3. Take in More Information

I do much more listening on twitter than I tweet. This way I get to see and remember more about people that others might miss. You can do this by connecting through somebody’s blog also, by following them closely. Just pay attention.

3．获取更多的资讯

在推特上我听得多，发表自己的言论少。通过这种方法我注意和记住了更多别人可能疏忽的细节。 你也可以通过链接一个人的博客，紧密地跟进更新来实现，只要你投入注意力就能做到。

4. Focus on One Person

I’d rather have a one on one conversation with a close friend than being part of a lively group of strangers, acquaintances or even friends. If you feel the same way, don’t despair. Focus on one person if you are online, or even in real life. Block out the noise, strike up a meaningful conversation with someone you admire and respect a lot. It is much easier online, they can’t see the sweat running down your face. Plus, you would also make them feel really special.

4．重点关注一个人

我宁愿与一个好朋友进行一对一的谈话，而不愿意成为一个活跃团体中的一员，无论是陌生人，还是熟人，甚至是朋友。如果你也有这中感觉，不要失望。在线的时候，只关注一个人，甚至在真实生活中都只关注一个人。避开外界的纷纷扰扰，与一个你欣赏和尊敬的人进行有意义的谈话。在线聊会更容易，即使你紧张得头上冒汗他们也看不出来。另外，你还能让他们觉得你特别。

5. Don’t Play Favourites

And this is the reason why networking gets such a bad rap.

It is actually easier for us introverts to build sound relationships, because we cherish each and every one of them. Unlike some savvy networkers - who meet so many people that they hardly remember them afterwards, and only pay attention to those who truly matter to them – we can really take time to build our relationships and take care of them. Remember, everybody deserves to be treated with respect and sincerity.

5．不要把网络社交当作游戏

这是网络社交招致恶名的原因。

实际上我们内向人比较容易建立健康的人际关系，因为我们珍惜身边的每个人。不象有些经验丰富的网虫- 他们同很多人聊，之后就几乎不记得了，他们只对那些真的在乎的人在意 – 我们可以真正地花些时间来建立人际关系，关心他们。记住，每一个人都是应该得到尊重和诚意的。

6. Network in Your Field

I find that I love talking to people if I can offer to help them out when it comes to writing, blogging or teaching. In fact, I take on a whole new personality.

Introverts often work very well in situations where they can use their skills to help other people. We are passionate about certain aspect of our work, product or business. We speak naturally and with enthusiasm and conviction about things that we are truly interested in. Once we go past our shyness, by focusing on a genuine reason to make a contact, we can be extremely effective.

We already listen well, help others when we can and and speak well when we are passionate about, we have the skills to build and nurture strong relationships. And this is the key to great networking.

6．在你熟悉的领域进行网络社交

我发现，当人们遇到些关于写作，写博客或者教学的问题而我又能为他们提供些帮助时，我会很乐意与他们交流。实际上，我呈现了一种全新的个性。

内向的人通常在能运用他们的技能帮助其它人时会表现得很出色。我们对于某些工作、产品或事情会很有热情。谈起我们真正感兴趣的东西，我们会自然流露出热情和自信。一旦克服了害羞，只就某一类话题同别人联系沟通，就可以给人留下深刻的印象。

我们已经擅长倾听了，然后尽己所能帮助别人，对于我们感兴趣的事畅所欲言，于是我们就具备所有的技能去建立和培养牢固的人际关系。这是成功网络社交的关键。

7. Give First

I saved the best one for last. The golden rule of networking is – as I am slowly learning - always give first! 

7. 先给予后索取

最好的建议留来压轴。网络社交的黄金法则- 如我正在慢慢学习的一样 – 记住君欲取之，必先予之。

Start now by reaching out to someone who matters a lot to you. Send them an email, or mention them on twitter. Write something on their Facebook page or simply connect with a brief exchange of tweets. Send them a link to an article that would really help them out. Let them know they mean a lot to you.  

现在开始联系那些你在乎的人。发封邮件给他们，或者在推特上特别提到他们。在他们的脸书上写下点什么，或者只是简单的联系一下。把一个对他们有帮助的文章链接发给他们。让他们知道你很在乎他们。

Are you an introvert? Which social media site do you normally use? Share your best tip for making connections in the comments below. I respond to each and every one of them!

你是一个内向的人吗？哪个社交媒介是你常用的？请在评价里分享你最好的建议，每条评论我都会回复。