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What Your Swimsuit Says About You, According to Guys

 bjvita 2012-07-26

What Your Swimsuit Says About You, According to Guys

Ever wonder what guys think about that super-trendy new swimsuit you’ve had your eye on all spring? Well, we’ve already quizzed men about hairstyles and jeans, so we decided to give bikinis and one-pieces the same treatment. Read on to find out what your bathing suit says about you…according to guys.

Polka dots are the print to pick.

“The perfect mix. A little sexy, a little classic, confident yet comfortable. This is the girl I want to get to know.” —Josh, 29

Sassy stripes are bold and fun.

“So many colors and stripe weights—this swimsuit says I'm outgoing and not afraid to try new things…or Trix yogurt.” —Gerhardt, 23

Accessorizing at the beach can send a flirty message.

“The one-piece suit says she considers herself a lady; the heels suggest that she wants to be noticed and flirted with.” —Mike, 37

Mixing and matching your swimsuit sends a confident vibe.

“[This suit] says, ‘I know I look good, and I'm not afraid to draw some attention to myself.’” —Paul, 26

Head-to-toe white is confident but approachable.

”Maybe it's because she appears to have been caught mid-Hokey Pokey, but you know this woman used to get up every morning at 6am to dance in front of the TV to The Grind. Which is perfect because that makes 2 of us. Yes ma'am, your boring friends may be snoozing in the sand, but we WILL join you for your solo dance party.” —Ben, 30

Shredded cover-ups look like they’re straight out of a horror film.

“Screams ‘heading to the beach with Freddy Krueger.’” —Eric, 34

“My girl here would start complaining that the pineapple’s too yellow in her [drink] in a heartbeat….” —Jared, 33

Some suits make dudes think of dessert—and that’s a good thing. Goofy novelty beach accessories are good for a laugh. A classic striped bikini can still surprise guys (in a really great way).

“This is the kind of girl that you might expect to wear a modest one-piece, but then she shows up at the beach wearing this striped bikini and even the ladies take notice.” —Robert, 27

Giant green furry boots don’t belong near the water.

“Furry, Chewbacca-inspired boots are never OK—not even at Coachella.” —David, 22

Cute details can be sexy.

“Pure, intimidating refinement. She is listening to secret music that only her ears can hear and if we tried to touch those headphones, we'd get zapped with an electric shock. Simple, primo taste.” —Ben, 30

Don’t forget your pants!

“Wow, she has a great body, but it really looks like she forgot her pants. If she had on a pair of cutoffs or a denim mini, she would be totally cute.” —Michael, 40

Floral prints look sweet.

“The quiet one. Pretty yet shy—this is the girl who's confident enough that she's not going out of her way to get noticed.” —Josh, 29

You don’t have to go too crazy to make a swimsuit statement.

“Fashion-forward. The girl in the Brooklyn coffee shop I'd talk to if only I knew just the right bands to mention.” —Josh, 29

Attention-getting bathing suits will make you look like you’re, uh, looking for attention.

“She’s looking for attention and doesn’t mind wearing something that’s kind of ridiculous to get it. She’s not at the beach to swim laps or to get a tan, because that bathing suit would be a disaster for either. She wants to at least give out an ‘I’m available’ vibe. She’s confident in her body.” —Sam, 33

Sporty suits attract the right kind of attention.

“Remember Winnie Cooper? All your memories will come rushing back.” —Chet, 35

Sometimes too much of a good thing is…too much of a good thing.

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