Living An Inner World LifeGazing into the abyss,one shall see nothing but darkness,and it is in this darkness one shall find his true nature,and it is this nature that protects him from falling. Wall-street,1987 Maybe you have taken this for granted:young beautiful ladies would always choose man with power and wealth. These men flirt around with any girl they've just met with their cool dressings and fancy cars. All they talk about is either the fancy restaurants they've been to,or the gurus they've dined with,or another lucrative projects waiting to be approved by some inside "relatives". But as women mature,you'll find that a part of them no longer get thrilled by these superficial stimuli. They will,contrary to usual,be fascinated by another kind of men. These men,judging by their appearances,are nothing but inconspicuous. They dress plainly yet clean,they never show off,never drive fancy cars,and do not possess any grand residences,let alone bragging about any of their accomplishments. These men tend to live a low-profile life. Whenever they make their appearances, a natural decorousness will get around in the atmosphere,making you feel calm and peaceful. They talk little,but every word that come out of their mouth will leave people in a silent introspection. They disappear gently when you are caught up in fickle excitements,and come to you instantly when help is the most needed, lift you up and bring you back to the right track. Any restless women would behave as good as a child by their side,losing their usual flippancy.Because like never before,these women are feeling a mysterious yet powerful warmth inside them, just like the good old days when they were held in the big hands of their beloved father. Where are these decorousness and power coming from? And what makes these man such a myth? They come from a CHOICE. After enough tests,inspections and retrospection of their understanding of humanity, men made the most important choice of their life consciously: To live in the inner world. What is the inner world? And why does it make a man more decorous to live in the inner world? Each of us live in two worlds:the outside world and the inner world. Our outside world defines our social character: what kind of job we do, how much wealth do we own, what kind of car do we drive, how nice our residences are, which brand our mobile-phones are, what kind of restaurants do we go to, how are our friends, how much the wedding budgets would be, what kind of schools our kids go to, how is the family background and social life circle,etc. All characteristics that are perceivable from the outside world. And these characteristics combined together are the indicators of how we differ from one another. Our inner world, however, is constructed with these elements:our religion, value, principle of handling personal relations, our creativity, wisdom and the meaning of our career, the relationship between our friends,family and lovers. There are THREE major differences between the two worlds: 1、The outside world is perceivable while the inner world is not 2、The outside world is quantifiable while the inner world is not 3、The outside world is comparable:high or low,big or small while the inner world is not The outside world is relative, and always changing,while the inner world is constant. Our outside world bears the strategy of survival, while our inner world holds up our eternal soul. One key question remains: Where should the essence of the a Romantic Relation lie,in the outside world or the inner one? The outside world Does it make your relationship more romantic if she chooses you over some other guy because you are richer and higher in social status? Is it more romantic if your wedding ceremony is more grand and have more people attending? Is it more romantic if you spend your honeymoon in a five-star hotel in Hawaii for a week than spending that time on an adobe-kang in the countryside? Or does it make you feel more romantic if you go to a western-style restaurant and have a 1000 yuan worth of dinner followed by an IMAX blockbuster,than spending your time at home in front of a DVD player with 80 yuan worth of take out? The inner world Do you still remember the beautiful butterfly in your stomach when you meet a girl and really want to ask her out the next day? Do you still remember the yearnings of having her to be your girlfriend when the reality is that both of you do not have the courage to say it out loud? How does it feel when you are challenged by her reserve,yet that reserve makes you more dedicated, and finally with this dedication you two get over all those obstacles and get together? Her restlessness and overreaction to anything in your getting-along process makes you so doubtful of this relationship,yet with your wisdom you finally make peace with each other.How does this feel? Our outside world can only demonstrate our survival skills yet the true essence of ROMANCE lies only in your inner world. Countless amount of people live in the fake "ROMANCE". They require so many of their ideal partner:young and pretty/social status,classic clothes,fancy houses and cars,nice family backgrounds,and satisfying degrees. They put everything measurable and use it against on their imaginary partners,fantasizing that the more they can get the more happier their "romance" would be.Their pursues are nothing but material,and the survival skills have completely replaced the eternal of the inner world. You WILL succeed,you will have a great advantage over others in terms of survival skills. You will always live a fancy life, after-all, Hawaii sounds a lot more "romantic" than countryside, doesn't it? But have you ever asked yourself, how much wealth do you need to possess to truly make you satisfied? How much more skillful in survival do you have to be to feel decent in life? Questions like these have been long forgotten by most of the outside-world-dwellers. If the outside world is the only thing that you see in life,the romance which belongs to the inner world will surely turn his back on you. Each time you encounter a woman "lower than" you, you will feel confident, because you see yet another easy trophy. But when the "higher than"you women show up, you feel inferior yet still trying to use all your survival skills to get her,because if you do,you raise your "level",again. Your emotion can be easily influenced by the imperfection of materials and the outside-world standards. Lows if not getting any, and highs fighting for it. See? No matter what, you will find yourself "pursuing for"something, deceiving the world and yourself for the rest of your life. Man with decorousness Let us look back at the man with decorousness, what is so different about him? He never lies to himself, since he knows exactly how crucial it is to live in the inner world. He can tell the difference between two doctors who graduated from the same school. He can tell who live for ill-gotten money and who live for saving others' lives He can tell the difference between two entrepreneurs who hold the same amount of assets. He can tell who get the money by playing the market and fooling and hurting other peoples' interests, and who get it only because he wants to push the world forward and trying to create something with positive meaning. He can immediately spot the girl with a kind nature but does not yet know how to protect herself among all kinds of snobs. He can always remain calm and peaceful by using his everlasting inner world power not matter how fast or how much the outside world changes. He can not be harmed by the betrayal of his friends or the stab of his enemies, failure or success does affect his emotions, because he know beneath every greedy faces there is a well-preserved inner world, which he choose to awake even if it means the loss of his own benefit. He can see through any woman's heart, he knows their restlessness, and what it takes for her to grow in this giddy world. He understands how to share with her in the inner world, but not just giving her more outside world stimuli, thus bestowing him with the true ability of loving. It does not mean that he is unaware of how to "survive" in a better way, quite the contrary, he will use his wisdom and intelligence to enhance his ability of creating wealth. Most importantly, he's fully grasped the meaning of living in one's inner world. He may not be the most notable one, but he will definitely be the most down-to-earth one. How do the men living in the inner world think: 1、know right from wrong, and choose to do the right 2、give up short term interests, and accumulate 3、never get near of any ill money 4、never talk about personal gains and losses 5、never do something just because the accomplishment this something might bring 6、never dress to attract attention 7、see inside, find the real reason 8、...... The list could be endless. But what's critical is that these men can actually hear what their hearts tell them and choose to do all these above. The inner world is stable, and when you too choose to live in your inner world, you will find yourself becoming calm and steady gradually. And you will eventually meet a woman with the same heart and live together in the true romance. You shall never be self-abased just because of all the "high-value" seeking women around you, and you shall never need to cover the anxiety beneath your aimless appearance. You shall surprisingly find the implication of "regardless of high and low, rich and poor",and the root of the humble self-confidence. Abandoning all the pointless disturbances, you will get more time to enrich yourself and engage yourself in more meaningful endeavors. Please adjust your focus to the inner world if you are now giving the outside world to much attention, and that would be my biggest wish. Though it is clear to me that that outside world dwellers are more often already sinking too deep, I still believe that the very outstanding YOU can fight your way back and actively choose to live in your inner world. Nv Yu Zhe |
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