 这篇文章前后大概花了十天的酝酿，实际更长。 最近的三次的大考的作文，有很多学生觉得比较难写，其根本原因是： 写作思维无法拓展，通俗说，无话可写。 写作思维是一个很复杂的概念，本文会结合两次作文来细说。这篇文章值得您的收藏。我写的文字表面看起来很容易理解，学生经常听完我的讲解后似乎恍然大悟：这种思维啊，我也会了。其实不然。因为逻辑思维的训练不是一朝一日能练就的，需要没事瞎琢磨。如同这次“辱母刺死案”，不同的人有不同角度来解读，但更多的人就是一腔怒火，一个字：我要杀，至于背后深层的社会原因，他不知道去分析。 希望本文能给广大考生带来一丝新意。 本文非常长，读者可以直接点击文末的“阅读原文”下载，直接可以打印精排版 引言 最近一段时间的模拟题写作最突出莫过于思维的拓展。先说我最近在网上看到的几篇文章：《逃离北上广》《我上了985、211依然一无所有》，然后有个段子说：学区值钱而学历不值钱。北大清华毕业的年轻父母都买不起北京的学区房，由此推导出“读书无用论”，辛苦一世不如有房两套。这个论调咋看起来还似乎激起共鸣。但是我们的思维是被对方牵着走。因为这些作者的衡量读书值不值的逻辑是：花钱读了高学历，必须尽快尽多地变现。也就是他们思维的成立前提就是：钱是衡量一切的标准。这就是思维的拓展之一：推理的前提。 我们看待一个社会现象，一定要沉下心，从多角度去考量。 应试作文也是如此。 一、如何概括 3个步骤：1.找关键句—》2.变化句子—》3.联句 解释：由于写作的文章各种题材都有可能：夹叙夹议、纯记叙、新闻、说明。这些文章也是经过命题人的处理，例如新闻，命题人会把第一段可能的总结去掉。但我发现，无论什么的话题文章只要做到以下三点会妥妥地写好概括： Step 1: 首先把各段的关键句和关键词找出来（划线）。 Step 2: 对关键句进行处理，去粗取精，把细节都拿掉，然后对句子的谓语和主语进行适当的变化。 Step 3: 将不同的句子连起来，注意：不要写太长的句子。 二、拓展思维的五种武器 思维点： 1.内外因 2.正反/好坏 3.物质、精神、社会 4.个人、社会(政府)、他人（集体） 5.正能量互补 拓展点： 1.因果 2.条件 3.定义 4.用途 5.方法/方式 6.比拟 7.举例 解释： 拿到一篇文章，一旦确定题目，我们这样在纸上迅速写下只言片语（单词都可以），围绕： 1.内因：内在的动机、品格、知识；外因：外在的环境、条件 2.正反/好坏：分两种情况：假设主要角色为A，次要角色为B。考虑A的好处或积极性，B的弊端；A的坏处，但是可以如何克服。 3. 物质、心理、社会。物质层面指的是金钱（也可以是说经济）、身体、空间、个人知识等；精神层面指的是情感、心理等；社会层面指的是集体、社区、道德、法律等。 4. 个人、社会(政府)、他人（集体）。这主要是围绕针对社会问题提出的建议，当然个人与他人包含了交际方向。 5. 正能量互补。正能量指的是积极方面的词汇，例如健康、幸福、目标、动力、美、乐于助人等。我们想到其中的一个，就要学会联想其它的，往往能形成逻辑链。 以上完成后，就要考虑：写出简单句，然后将它们分成三个左右的主题句。接下来就要针对主题句进行拓展了，拓展点有七个：1.因果；2.条件；3.定义；4.用途；5.方法/方式；6.比拟；7.举例。 三、实战第一篇：2017苏锡常镇卷 请阅读下面短文，并按照要求用英语写一篇150词左右的文章。 Taking babies on their flights can be incredibly discouraging for parents. They’re often faced with the passengers who may get annoyed. Stares, sighs, complaints and shakes of the head are just a few things that keep parents from looking their fellow passengers in the eye. Therefore, some parents try to make it easier for their fellow passengers by handing out goodie bags as a beforehand apology — usually filled with some candy and a set of ear plugs. Going with the bag is a note like this: Hi stranger! My name is Andaqi. I will be 4 months on January 15th and this is my first flight. I’ll try to be on my best behavior, but I’d like to apologize in advance if I lose my cool, get scared or my ears hurt. I’m also at the beginning stages of teething so I don’t always feel good. I know I’m just a baby but I want you to enjoy this flight as well. My mom, Niqelle, packed you this goodie bag with a few treats. There are also ear plugs in case my first public serenade isn’t as enjoyable to you as it is to my mom. Have a great flight and thanks for understanding! Andaqi & Niqelle This immediately went viral online. Some think it’s a nice gesture and they’re just trying to be nice — a good instinct in these tense times. However, others think differently as babies should not need to apologize for being babies. 【写作内容】 1. 用约30个词概括上述短文的主要内容； 2. 用约120个词就上述话题发表你的看法，内容包括以下要点： （1）你是否赞成这种行为； （2）用2 ～ 3个理由或论据支撑你的看法。 一、如何写概括： 1.找关键词句： Taking babies on their flights can be incredibly discouraging for parents. Therefore, some parents try to make it easier for their fellow passengers by handing out goodie bags as a beforehand apology — usually filled with some candy and a set of ear plugs. Some think it’s a nice gesture and they’re just trying to be nice — a good instinct in these tense times. However, others think differently as babies should not need to apologize for being babies. 注意：中间的信的内容一定不要写。首段第一句是主题句，然后第二句是说父母烦恼的具体内容，第三句总结。我们无需要第二句的具体内容。总结句里面的usually filled with some candy and a set of ear plugs也不用留了，这也是具体内容。最后一段写有两种意见，不要写意见的内容，大概说有人反对有人支持即可。这样我们就可以总结如下： (1) Taking babies on their flights can be incredibly discouraging for parents. (2) Some parents try to make it easier for their fellow passengers by handing out goodie bags as a beforehand apology (3) Some think it’s a nice gesture. However, others think differently 2.联句 仔细观查前两句，我们发现take babies是parents的动作，这样就形成逻辑链，可以用构成非谓语动词结构或介词短语。 Some parents hand out goodie bags to fellow passengers as a beforehand apology for fear of them when taking babies on their flight. It has aroused a heated debate. 或： Many parents with babies on the flight will hand out goodie bags to fellow passengers as a beforehand apology. Some people support it while others do not. 提示： 请读者一定要留意2014年高考真题的范文框架： 第一种： Today, more and more English words find their way into the Chinese language... Some people support it while others do not. Generally, I am in favour of the inclusion. … So, it’s safe to conclude that.... 第二种： With … doing… in both media and daily life, a Chinese dictionary has included 239 of them, leaving the public divided into two opposing groups: “For” and “Against.” I tend to take the “Against” side for two reasons. Firstly, …Secondly, such an inclusion may give rise to …. Just for one illustration, … In short, not only has …, it may also bring about …. 二、正文思维拓展 先确定主题：为婴儿的噪音道歉有没有必要？（有同学把中心放在小礼物上，这是不恰当的） 然后我们围绕“道歉”的本身来思考。其实我觉得看待任何社会现象，都应该先考虑这种现象的内涵，如果对事物的本身都不理解，后面的拓展就会偏离本质。 1.从道歉的产生的前提条件考虑：孩子发出噪音。再根据因果拓展：噪音会有哪些消极结果？（干扰他人的工作和休息；精神紧张） 2.从道歉带来的好处考虑：这必须是正能量，一是道歉体现了父母的品质（礼貌），二是道歉会增进人与人之间的关系（融洽，同情，沟通，缓解紧张的气氛） 开始动笔： 1.distract one’s attention from work 2.add to one’s tiredness and emotional upset 3.relieve the tension 4.encourage communication 5.arouse one’s empathy 以下是我在黑板上的板书示意图： 将以上的只言片语用简单句写出来，同时快速拓展： 1.The noises will distract the fellow passengers’ attention from his work. (原因：公共场合应该是peaceful) 2. It can add to their tiredness and emotional upset.（原因：旅途艰辛） 3. It can relieve the tensions. 4. It can encourage communication. 5. It can arouse others’ empathy. (以上三句可以合并两句，适当加一个比较好的比拟。考生平时要多积累人际关系方面的好词块) 成段： （1）思维拓展：个人与他人、反向；句子拓展：因果 I also think it necessary to make an apology. On one hand, the baby’s noises will distract others’ attention. It is common sense that the airplane should be a peaceful place where no one is disturbed. Worse still, babies’ crying can add to their tiredness. One will feel annoyed in the absence of a good rest in a long and tiring journey. （2）思维拓展：正能量互补+正向；句子拓展：比喻（shoes, catalyst） On the other hand, an apology can relieve the tensions. It is easy to arouse the other’s empathy if you put yourself in his or shoes. Parents’ thoughtful goodie bags serve as the catalyst bridging the gap and encouraging further active communication. 提示：有很多同学写到最后完全和主题偏离了，所以要时时记住点题，最后一句的主语我本来写an apology，最终还是换成了The parents’ thoughtful goodie bags，原因你知道的！ （3）总结： In a word, such a behavior should be advocated both for the benefit of others and a more peaceful atmosphere. 完整的文章： Many parents along with babies on the flight will hand out goodie bags to fellow passengers as a beforehand apology. Some people support it while others do not. (27个词) I also think it necessary to make an apology. On one hand, the baby’s noises will distract others’ attention. It is common sense that the airplane should be a peaceful place where no one can be disturbed. Worse still, babies’ crying can add to their tiredness. One will feel annoyed in the absence of a good rest in a long and tiring journey. On the other hand, an apology can relieve the tensions. It is easy to arouse the other’s empathy if you put yourself in his or shoes. Parents’ thoughtful goodie bags serve as the catalyst bridging the gap and encouraging further active communication. In a word, such a behavior should be advocated both for the benefit of others and a more peaceful atmosphere. (124个词) 以上我是从赞成的角度写的，如果是反对呢？我这里就不写了，大概说一下思维方式，考生可以自己快速写成： （1）从道歉的影响考虑（负能量）：给父母带来精神压力（mental pressure）-->原因：好像犯了很大的错；让乘客比较尴尬—》不知道如何接受礼物，担心伤害对方的好意（embarrassment, fear to hurt the parents’ good intention） （2）从道歉本身考虑（孩子哭闹是不可避免的） （3）从政府角度考虑：飞机上应该专门有婴儿专门区域等 参考答案： (Approval) To apologize for their babies’ possible annoying noises, some mothers hand out goodie bags and notes in the name of babies to passengers around. This soon becomes a buzz topic. (30words) Such an initiative and behavior, from my perspective, should be encouraged. To begin with, it’s polite to make an apology to those suffering from noise babies make even though sometimes we can’t avoid it. In addition, this nice gesture may ease tensions crying babies create and get understanding from people around. Most importantly, it’s an absolute adorable way to remind people to be patient with babies in a very sweet way. After all, in public places, everyone is responsible for the maintenance of a peaceful environment so as to leave people around in a better state of mind. All in all, such a thoughtful and simple act of kindness can convey genuine feeling and I’ll give the mother a thumb-up. (120words) (Against) To apologize for their babies’ possible annoying noises, some mothers hand out goodie bags and notes in the name of baby to passengers around. This soon becomes a buzz topic. (30words) I don’t think it necessary. In the first place, as young parents, you should not be scared of other people’s ill looks because of your kids making noises, for kids will be kids. What’s more, I am grown up enough not to be pacified with a goodie bag. Probably the best goodie bag for parents would be a kind word of encouragement. Last but not least, these goodie bags send the message that you should feel bad for having babies who act like babies, which has rubbed many parents the wrong way from the start. To sum up, you don’t need to bend over backwards to please others and you don’t owe strangers candy for sitting next to your babies. (120words ) 实战第二篇：2017南通徐州等六市联考 请阅读下面短文，并按照要求用英语写一篇150词左右的文章。 The news that Li Tiejun, a father in the southwestern city of Luzhou, had his nine-year-old daughter drop out of school and homeschooled her for 11 years has aroused heated discussions online. It is reported that about 18,000 Chinese children are educated at home. With more parents and education experts dissatisfied with the current system, do you support home schooling for your child? Below are the selections of the opinions from the netizens. Seneca Li is a hero. But at the same time, it has to be pointed out that he was and is not the ideal teacher for his daughter. She can’t possibly learn about physics, chemistry and biology from an elderly man with no formal higher education. I wish his daughter all the success in life that she may wish to have. nit666 I was homeschooled until I was about 12. In Australia, we have a remote school option for people who live away from the cities. We were taught through mail. I would say that you can learn as much knowledge as people in a school. My life were much happier without the kind of academic pressure. 【写作内容】 1. 用约30个单词写出上文概要； 2. 用约 120 个单词发表你的观点，内容包括: (1)支持或反对家长自己在家教孩子的做法； (2)用 2-3个理由或论据支撑你的观点。 一、如何写概括 1.找关键词句： 1. The news…has aroused heated discussions online. 2. dissatisfied with the current system 3. the opinions from the netizens 正反意见：不要写内容，只写意见不同 合并句子的时候请注意： （1）由于本文是新闻，而开始是举例子，然后说明一个现象，所以，不要把例子放在概括里； （2）如果要用到关键句，一定要做合适的调整，不能照抄，例如：主动句变成被动句；同义词替换 2.联句 Many children nowadays are homeschooled by their parents who are dissatisfied with the current system, leaving the netizens divided into two opposing groups: “For” and “Against.”. （27个词） 注意：本句就是参考了14年高考范文。我看了一下本次考试范文，觉得第一句和文章并不是十分符合，以下为一己之见，原因：1. the availability of educational resources（这个看不出在哪里能总结出来，文章只是说父母可以教孩子）2. more and more attractive to parents （文章只是说有18,000个孩子在家里受教育，越来越多家长不满意教育现状。这个数字相对于上亿的学生不能说明什么；家长不满意不代表家庭受教育越来越有吸引力，逻辑关系不严密） 二、正文思维拓展 本文我来写支持方。 先从正方向谈： （1）home schooling的本身的必要性：外因：应试教育的不利、学校偏远；内因：孩子自身的健康发展（得到更多的关注；自由）（内因；精神） （2）home schooling的正能量：父母孩子之间相处更融洽(人与人之间的关系) 再从反方向谈：（对比法和以退为进策略） （1）学校教育的弊端：孩子受忽视；考试压力大 （2）home schooling的缺点：缺少与同龄人接触，但可以参与各种社会活动（如夏令营）。 板书： 将以上的只言片语用简单句写出来，同时快速拓展： 1. Parents can get along well with children-->(结果)bridge the generation gap and strengthen the emotional ties. 2. Get more attention—》(结果)academic performance 3. It allows children more freedom and time （结果）so that they can pursue their interests. 4. It can avoid the pressure school exam-oriented education brings-->(结果)mental health 5. inconvenience of some schools in remoted areas 提示：以上不能全部一条条写，要学会组合，分析其中的逻辑关系，例如2，4可以合并。 反向：(in contrast) 1.feel ignored -->lack motivation; under great pressure 2.peer contact--> join in social activities (以退为进) 成文： Many children nowadays are homeschooled by their parents who are dissatisfied with the current system, leaving the netizens divided into two opposing groups: “For” and “Against.”. （27个词） Personally, home schooling should be advocated for the following reasons. First, home-education not only allows children more liberty to cultivate personal hobbies, but also helps bridge the generation gap and thus strengthen familial emotional ties. Second, parents can devote more attention to their children’s physical development, while children in school may well be ignored and fall behind for the lack of care. Last, the current technology has made it possible for some families in remoted areas to accept high-quality home schooling where children have hard access to schools. Of course, despite some drawbacks such as the lack of enough peer contact, children can join in social activities like summer vacation. So home education, I believe, must gain more popularity in the future. (122个词) 以上我是从赞成的角度写的，我在大概说一下反对的思维： 先从反方向谈： （1）home schooling的本身的危害性：不利于孩子身心发展（缺少和同龄人沟通）--》不利于未来融入群体（fit in the group）；父母知识的不足(cannot be updated)-->不能满足未来社会需求（meet the future demands） （2）home schooling的外在环境：缺少科学的实验和根据（a lack of scientific experiment） （3）home schooling中父母和孩子关系：父母干预孩子的空间更多(interfere with children’s privacy);父母的时间有限；巨大的经济压力 再从正方向谈： 学校教育一直在改革，不断适应时代潮流。（keep with time） 参考范文： Possible version 1: With the availability of educational resources, home schooling is an option that is becoming more and more attractive to parents nowadays. However, some people support it while others do not. I am strongly against this practice. Home schooling is not allowed in our country because it is compulsory for parents to send their kids to schools for an all-round education. In addition, the biggest drawback of home schooling is a lack of interaction with others. The social experiences at school are very essential to enable a child to fit into the competitive society. Homeschooled children may lose many chances to compete with their peers. What’s worse, learning outside a school environment can consume a lot of mom’s or dad’s time, which can be a big challenge for families to balance their budget. In short, it is necessary that children should be sent to public or private schools for formal schooling. (150 words) Possible version 2: With the availability of educational resources, home schooling is an option that is becoming more and more attractive to parents nowadays. However, some people support it while others do not. I support home schooling. In some cases, a few children have no access to education due to location or physical disability, and home schooling can fulfill their dream of receiving education. With home schooling, parents and their children can work out a schedule that suit them best. Thus, they enjoy more freedom and autonomy in their learning. Last but not least, while home schooling, parents can focus on the improvement of their children’s various ability which are badly needed in the competitive society. At same time, they can help children learn and complete the basic requirements needed to pass tests. In short, with proper guidance and discipline, home schooling will provide an ideal education designed just for the children themselves.(150 words) 感谢 从我推出《英语经典美文话题读写100篇网课》后，CCtalk中报名人数很快上升到600人，此为公益课。两天时间，本书销售为500余册，感谢大家的支持。 我准备公益直播间20小时通讲完。这将是你的学习史和我的教学史上最有价值的体验，一次绝对酣畅淋漓的学习。它会彻底终结你的英语写作和思维无法提高的历史。周三后（2017.3.27）书价从优惠价100元恢复到200元一本。原则上不再对外销售。 如何免费听 美文按照新课标话中关于文化品格的话题分类。你有三种方式进入： 第一种：（推荐） 下载CCtalk软件（手机端也有CCtalk的app)，登陆后（扣扣或微信登陆），在搜索框输入群号：81583608，进去就可以了。（以后可以准时进来听课，随时进来听录播） 可以手机和电脑端收看，非常顺畅。 |
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