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7 Signs You Have Raised a Spoiled Kid (And What To Do About It)7个表现告诉你，你的孩子被宠坏了（以及你现在该怎么办）By Felicity Lewis ︱ November 29 , 2019 A spoiled child is used to getting what they want when they want it with few exceptions.
一个被宠坏的孩子习惯于在他们想要的时候得到他们想要的东西，只有少数例外。The spoiled child problem appears to be getting worse. In fact, 59% of parents think their kids are more spoiled than they were at the same age, according to a 2011 survey from Parenting and Today Moms.宠溺孩子的问题似乎越来越严重。事实上，根据2011年的一项“育儿与今日妈妈”的调查，59%的父母认为他们的孩子比自己小的时候更娇生惯养。“Children do what we train them to do, what we lead them to expect,” Laura Markham, Clinical psychologist said. “If we have parented permissively and have never set limits, the child will not be used to accommodating appropriate limits.”临床心理学家劳拉·马卡姆说：“孩子们做我们教给他们做的事，做我们引导他们期望做的事。如果我们的父母是纵容的，从来没有设置过边界，孩子就不会习惯于接受适当的限制。”When parents spoil their children, their intentions are often good, albeit misguided. They indulge their kids because they want to provide them with the best life possible, giving them everything Mom and/or Dad didn’t have growing up.当父母宠坏孩子时，虽然不正确，但他们的出发点往往是好的。他们满足孩子的要求是因为他们想给他们最好的生活，给他们父母在成长过程中没有的一切。Signs Your Kid Could Be SpoiledNot sure if your kiddo fits the bill? Below are seven expert-backed signs they might be overindulged and under-disciplined.难以确定你的孩子是否符合要求？下面七个迹象由专家选出，表明孩子可能是过度放纵和纪律不严。When you tell them “no,” they throw a tantrum until they get their way.
当你对他们说“不”的时候，他们会发脾气直到他们得逞。All kids may express some disappointment when you tell them they can’t, for example, have pizza for dinner two nights in a row. But spoiled children have a particularly hard time taking no for an answer.例如，连续两个晚上吃比萨饼，当你对孩子说“不”时，可能所有的孩子都会表达一些失望。但被宠坏的孩子很难接受你说“不”。Tantrums might be developmentally appropriate for toddlers or very young kids who can’t adequately express themselves, explained marriage and family therapist LeNaya Smith Crawford . But if these meltdowns are happening all the time and don’t subside as the kid gets older, that could be an indication they’re spoiled.婚姻和家庭治疗师莉娜娅·史密斯·克劳福德解释说，使性子发脾气可能在发育上更多出现于那些不能充分表达自己的幼儿或非常小的孩子。但如果这些崩溃的表现一直在持续，并且没有随着孩子的长大而消退，那可能表明他们被宠坏了。They’re never satisfied with what they have.
Spoiled children may have all the toys and clothes in the world, but it’s never enough: They want more, more, more.被宠坏的孩子可能拥有世界上所有的玩具和衣服，但这永远不够：他们想要更多，更多，更多。“Because they have a lot, they tend to be unappreciative and a bit greedy,” Said Michele Borba，educational psychologist.教育心理学家米雪儿 博巴说：“因为他们有很多东西，他们往往不领情，有点贪婪。”。Instead of expressing their gratitude for what they have, they’re more focused on getting the next thing.与对自己已经拥有的东西表示感恩，他们却更专注于得到下一个东西。They think the world revolves around them.
Spoiled kids tend to be self-centered. They aren’t all that concerned with inconveniencing other people.被宠坏的孩子往往以自我为中心。他们并不完全关心给别人带来不便。“Spoiled kids think more of themselves than of others,” Borba said. “They feel entitled and expect special favors.”博巴说：“被宠坏的孩子比别人更看重自己。”。“他们觉得自己有资格得到特别的关注。”They demand things ASAP.
Bratty children aren’t particularly patient: When they want something, they want it now.让人讨厌的孩子不是特别有耐心：当他们想要什么的时候，他们现在就要得到。“It’s usually easier to give in than to postpone the child’s request,” Borba said.博巴说：“通常情况下，让步比推迟孩子的要求容易。”They’re sore losers.
No kid enjoys losing — be it a board game or a tennis match — but spoiled ones may have a tougher time managing disappointment when they don’t win.没有一个孩子喜欢失败——不管是下棋还是网球赛——但被宠坏的孩子在输掉的时候可能会更难处理失望情绪。“If your child is always blaming others for poor performance, expecting to be singled out for praise for everything they do, yells at others who aren’t doing things their way and fails to give recognition when their teammates or competitors are successful, you may have a spoiled child on your hands,” therapist Virginia Williamson told Best Life.“如果你的孩子总是责怪别人表现不好，期望别人单独表扬他们做的每件事，对那些不按自己的方式做事的人大喊大叫，当他们的队友或竞争对手成功时，他们没有给予认可，那么你的手上可能会有一个被宠坏的孩子，”治疗师维吉尼亚威廉森告诉“最佳生活”栏目。They don’t give up until they get what they want.
Spoiled kids may employ manipulative tactics to get the “yes” they’re after, whether that means lying or pitting their parents against one another.被宠坏的孩子可能会用一些操纵策略来获得他们想要的肯定答案，不管这意味着撒谎还是让他们的父母互相竞争。“For example, going to one parent and saying the other parent said they could have the item they desire,” Smith Crawford said.史密斯·克劳福德说：“比如，跟一位家长说另一位家长说他们可以得到他们想要的东西。”等等。They refuse to complete even simple tasks until you beg or bribe them.
It’s normal for kids to need some prompting to brush their teeth or clean up their toys, for example. But once a parent asks them to do something, they should listen. If your child frequently refuses to do very basic things until you plead or incentivize them with money, treats or toys, you could be setting a bad precedent.例如，孩子们需要提示来刷牙或整理玩具是很正常的。但一旦父母要求他们做某事，他们就应该照办。如果你的孩子经常拒绝做一些非常基本的事情，直到你用金钱、零食或玩具来恳求或激励他们，你可能开了一个坏的先例。
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