|
Some people rate movies or restaurants. He rates benches
有人给电影评级，有人给餐厅加星，而他却给椅凳做点评 By AJ Willingham / Sept. 12, 2020 Edited and Translated by Sally Sam Wilmot has been rating benches on Instagram since June 2019. He gave this bench in Bristol, England, a 6/10 in December. “It’s a big and strong bench with plenty of places to sit and a view of the lake,” he wrote.山姆 威尔莫特自2019年6月以来一直在Instagram上对长椅进行评级。去年12月，他给了英格兰布里斯托尔的这张板凳6/10的分数。他写道：“这是一张又大又结实的长椅，可以坐好几个人，还能看到湖景。”。Wilmot sits outside the Winter Gardens in Weston-super-Mare, England, in December. “The bench was made of granite which was pretty cold,” he wrote. “The back rest was unusable as it meant shifting all the way back on the seat, resulting in your feet coming off the floor. I try (to) remain grounded at all times. The arm rests are nothing more than granite segments that are a skateboarding deterrent. Anti-fun. There was a paved base and a pleasant view to enjoy. 4/10.”十二月，威尔莫特坐在英格兰滨海韦斯顿的冬季花园外。“长凳是用花岗岩做的，很冷，”他写道。“靠背是没法用的，因为这意味着要一直向后移动，导致你的脚离开地面。而我试图时刻保持脚踩地面。扶手只不过是一块花岗岩，滑板在这里玩不了。无趣。倒是有一个石砌的地面和一个不错的景观。4分。”A pandemic is raging. Political rancor is festering across the globe. Wildfires are eating away our precious natural resources, and the grocery store is still out of paper towels. Everything is, in a word, terrible.瘟疫正在肆虐。政治仇恨正在全球蔓延。野火正在吞噬我们宝贵的自然资源，而食品杂货店的纸巾仍然缺货。总之，一切都很糟糕。Let’s forget all of that for a moment. Come, take a seat on this bench, and breathe.This moment of bench-based clarity is brought to you by Sam Wilmot, a 23-year-old from a small town outside of Bristol, England. Through his Instagram project “Rate This Bench,” Wilmot does what it says on the tin: He rates benches. It’s not that complicated. But like a good bench-sitting session, a scroll through “Rate This Bench” unearths some fun facts, some fascinating banter, and some lovely views.来自英国布里斯托尔郊外一个小镇的23岁的山姆·威尔莫特为你带来了这一时刻的有关板凳的清晰画面。通过他的Instagram上的“为这张长椅打分”的活动，威尔莫特做到了他所说的：给长椅板凳打分。这并不复杂。但就像一个好的坐板凳过程一样，滚动浏览“为这张长椅板凳打分”会发现一些有趣的事实，一些迷人的玩笑，和一些可爱的观点。Wilmot works in his garden in April. “As benches go this isn’t one, no prizes for guessing it’s an old tree stump but it provides plenty of warmth from the sun and the brick wall,” he wrote. “The view is pleasant but the sounds of the road are not. 2/10.”四月份威尔莫特在他的花园里工作。他写道：“这实际上算不上是个凳子，这是个老树桩，从太阳和砖墙，为它提供了足够的温暖。景色宜人，但马路传来的噪音却不然。2分。”A quirky idea becomes a community一个古怪的想法变成了一个社群 Wilmot started “Rate This Bench” a little more than a year ago when he was getting his master’s degree at Swansea University.一年多前威尔莫特在斯旺西大学攻读硕士学位时，就开始了“为长椅板凳打分”。“It started out as a joke with friends,” he said. “We were out one day at university, and I started commenting on the benches we see. And we thought, that would be a quirky idea for an Instagram page. Then it started to be quite in-depth.”他说：“一开始是和朋友开玩笑。“我们上学的一天，我开始评论我们看到的长椅。后来我们认为，对于Instagram账户来说，这该是个奇怪的想法。然后就开始相当深入地评价了。”A bench, after all, is an endless source of creative potential, and Wilmot took that spirit and ran with it. Now the whole project has a devoted following and a very specific aesthetic. Each post is topped with Wilmot sitting stoically on a bench, and it features in-depth notes of the bench’s attributes and surroundings. And, of course, no adjudication would be complete without photos of what one actually sees when they sit on it.毕竟，长椅带来了创造的无穷源泉，威尔莫特带着这种精神干了起来。现在整个项目有一个忠实的粉丝群和一个非常具体的美学观点。每一个帖子的顶部都是威尔莫特面无表情地坐在长椅上的照片，它对长椅的属性和周围环境进行了深入的注释。当然，如果没有一张人们坐在上面的照片，任何裁决都是不完整的。The photos are mostly taken by Wilmot’s girlfriend, he said, and the rest are taken by various friends or family members. “North Devon really does have some of the best scenery and benches around,” Wilmot wrote in this post from August. “A short walk from our campsite down the mother of all hills reveals this gem that looked across the private Bay of Lee Abbey. The grass embankment was a little wild and the base over grown but it provided enough of a space to plant my feet. The bench was comfortable, wooden, well constructed and had the all important arms and dedication. The back rest was a good height and there was a curvature to the seat. All in all a very solid and satisfying place to sit, breathe and ponder, 7/10.”他说，这些照片大多是他的女朋友拍的，其余的都是各种朋友或家人拍的。威尔莫特在八月的这篇文章中写道：“北德文郡确实有一些最好的风景和长椅。从我们的营地走一小段路，沿着万山之母（mother of all hills）就可以看到这颗宝石，它可以俯瞰李修道院的私人海湾。草有点荒芜，长椅下的草有些长得太高，但它提供了足够的空间来放置我的脚。这张长椅很舒服，木质的，结构很好，有所需的重要的扶手和题词。靠背的高度很高，而且座位也有弧度。总而言之，这是一个非常稳固和令人满意的地方，可以坐下来、呼吸和思考，7分。”Make no mistake: Wilmot takes the business of rating benches very seriously.“I really break it down into 10 marks,” he said. “Three marks for the view and location. Marks for being wooden.” (“They are comfortable and sturdy,” he explained.)“我真的把它分为10分，”他说。“3分是给风景和位置的。” 他解释道：“它们既舒适又结实。”“If there’s curvature to the seat, something that offers some way to relieve pressure on your bum, that’s good. Or a concrete base to stop your shoes from getting dirty.”“如果座椅有弧度，可以缓解臀部的压力，那就好了。或者是一个混凝土底座来防止鞋子弄脏。”Marks are also given for back rests, arm rests and dedication plaques or inscriptions.Wilmot sits in a mall in March, during the height of the coronavirus pandemic. “The seat itself is comfortable with decent depth to allow for maximum bottom/legs to bench. The back rest was horrendous, next to no comfort provided at all. There’s no arm rest or plaque to read and the setting is pretty miserable in this current situation and in general. 2/10. I didn’t like it. It’s barely a bench.”威尔莫特坐在一家购物中心里，三月正是冠状病毒大流行的高峰期。“座椅本身很舒适，深度适中，可以最大限度地让臀部/腿部坐在长椅上。靠背很可怕，几乎没有任何舒适感。没有扶手可供休息或牌匾可供阅读，在目前的情况下，整个环境都很糟糕。2分。我不喜欢。这只是一张长凳。”A quick tour of the more than 180 benches he’s rated reveal other judge preferences: Perfunctory or carelessly built benches are poorly received, as are benches that have dividing railings or other features that Wilmot describes as “anti-homeless.” (These features are often installed to keep people from lying down, and are shunned in many architecture and city planning communities.)快速浏览一下他评价的180多个长椅，可以发现判定的其他特点：敷衍了事或粗心大意的椅凳很难被接受，被威尔莫特称之为“反无家可归者”的带有分隔栏杆的长椅或长凳也是如此，（在许多建筑和城市规划社区中都被回避。）Good benches tend to have some history, some ergonomics and nice surroundings. But no bench has ever received that coveted 10/10 rating.好的长椅往往有一些历史，一些人体工程学和良好的环境。但从来没有一个长椅得到过令人垂涎的满分评级。“The final mark, which I’ve never really given, is the one that makes you go ‘Wow,’ ” Wilmot said.威尔莫特说：“最高的一个分数，我从来没有真正给出过，那是会让你发出‘哇’的一个长椅。”。Will he ever give that rating? Who knows. But it’s a good way, he says, of keeping expectations in check.他会给那个分数吗？谁知道呢。但他说，这是一个很好的方法，可以控制人们的期望值。“I don’t want to be too critical,” he said. “I try to remain sort of impartial.”“This little corner in Ashton offers a great place to sit and enjoy the scent of lavender and the bees buzzing around the sunflowers,” Wilmot wrote in August 2019. “The view isn’t great but it’s a lovely idea. As for the bench, it’s plastic on an iron frame so there’s a moment of panic when you sit down and it moves ever so slightly. But it’s pleasant. 5/10.”威尔莫特在2019年8月写道：“阿什顿的这个小角落提供了一个很好的地方，可以坐下来享受薰衣草的香味，蜜蜂在向日葵周围嗡嗡作响。风景不太好，但坐这里是个不错的主意。至于长凳，它是塑料的，装在铁架上，所以当你坐下来时，会有一种恐慌的感觉，但它的晃动非常轻微。但一切愉快的。5分。”While he hasn’t come across a platonically perfect bench, Wilmot still has his favorites.虽然他还没有遇到一个柏拉图式的最完美长椅，但威尔莫特仍然有他的最爱。platonically：柏拉图哲学的;理想的;不切实际的“There’s one in a little place where I live, a place called Old Sodbury. It’s got a really nice base, it looks out across the countryside and my town, and it’s at the church,” he said. “I’ve given it a 9.”“在我住的一个小地方有一个叫老索德伯里的地方。它有一个非常好的底座，坐在那里可以俯瞰整个乡村和我的城镇，它就在教堂边。我给了它9分。”He also has a fondness for a bench in his town dedicated to a young man who lost his life in a traffic accident. “It’s massive,” he said. “Probably the biggest bench I’ve ever rated.”他还喜欢镇上的一张长椅，那是专门为一位在交通事故中丧生的年轻人捐献的。“它非常的大，”他说。“可能是我见过的最大的长椅。”“This bench had an emotional dedication on it and I think the bench is a unique and loving gesture,” Wilmot said of this bench in Bristol in December. “I really appreciate the solid wooden carving, the gentle slope in the seat, the height of the back rest and how firm the arms are. It’s a big and strong bench with plenty of places to sit and a view of the lake. In the summer this would be an ideal spot to sit with some grub from the @saltandmalt. As with all benches a concrete or paved base would have prevented dirty shoes. The bench also held water fairly poorly but these are only small drawbacks. This is a 6/10 for its artistic design and for being a loving dedication to Georgia from the ‘Uni girls’.”威尔莫特去年12月在布里斯托尔谈到这张长椅时说：“这张椅子上有一种情感上的奉献，我认为这张椅子是一种独特而充满爱心的表示。我真的很欣赏实木雕刻，座椅上的缓缓的倾斜，靠背的高度，以及扶手的牢固程度。这是一个又大又结实的长椅，可以坐很多人，可以看到湖景。夏天的时候，这里是一个理想的地方，坐着吃点腌肉。就像所有的长椅一样，一个混凝土或石铺的地面可以防止脏鞋。板凳不是很防水，但这些都只是小缺点。为它的艺术设计和捐献题词打6分。Wilmot’s bench-rating quest isn’t one he maps out. He goes with the flow, and when he comes across an interesting bench he just sits on it and, well, goes from there. The fact that people love his posts for the humor and the views — whether political or pastoral — is just proof that bench content is an untapped source of comfort in these trying times.威尔莫特的为长椅打分的行为并不是他计划出来的路线。他顺其自然，当他遇到一个有趣的长凳，他就坐在上面，然后，嗯，从那里走了。事实上，人们喜欢他的文章的幽默和观点-无论是政治的或田园的 - 只能说明，在一个个试坐的过程中，长椅带给人们的愉悦是一个尚未开发的给人们以慰籍的来源。“Things are pretty gloomy at the moment with everything going on. Across the sea here, our own people are just looking for something a little bit different,” he said.他说：“目前一切都很糟糕。在这里的大洋彼岸，我们自己的人只是在寻找一些与众不同的东西。”。Maybe that’s what we all need right now: A little chat, a little humor, and a nice place to sit.也许这正是我们现在所需要的：聊聊天，幽默一把，并找个好椅子坐下。Wilmot sits in front of a statue of former boxing champion David Pearce in Newport, Wales, in August 2019.2019年8月，威尔士新港，威尔莫特坐在前拳击冠军大卫·皮尔斯雕像前。
|
