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8月28日雅思大作文示范写作 | 上大学之前,我可以休假一年吗?

2021-10-11  露西小栈

     本期作者:刘静

    2021年8月28雅思大作文题目

    School leavers go travelling or work before they go directly to the university.

    Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages on their study?

    本周的考题是剑桥5上的一道真题,虽然问法不完全一致,但参考范文也完全可以回应今天这道题目。本期,我们就来分析一下考官范文。

    范文

    Introduction

    It is quite common these days for young people in many countries to have a break from studying after graduating from high school. The trend is not restricted to rich students who have the money to travel, but is also evident among poorer students who choose to work and become economically independent for a period of time.

    【解析】

    · 开头就是背景铺垫,同义替换“have a break from studying after graduating from high school”点出核心讨论主题

    · It is quite common these days for somebody to do something.

    Body Paragraph 1

    The reasons for this trend may involve the recognition that a young adult who passes directly from school to university is rather restricted in terms of general knowledge and experience of the world. 对比By contrast, those who have spent some time earning a living or travelling to other places have a broader view of life and better personal resources to draw on. 递进They tend to be more independent, which is a vert important factor in academic study and research, as well as giving them an advantage in terms of coping with the challenges of student life.

    【解析】

    · 先分析“利”的一面:间休年能让学生见识更广博、拥有更多可利用的个人资源、变得独立且能应对生活挑战。

    · 对比:by contrast  对比过程中要有侧重,避免更重篇幅落在对“直接升学”的讨论上,这部分考官只用了一句话带过,约占整段内容的1/3。

    · recognition 认知 = understanding (n.)

      have a broader view of life 拓宽人生视野

      draw on personal resources 利用个人资源

      cope with the challenges of life 应对人生挑战

    Body Paragraph 2

    However, there are certainly dangers in taking time off at that important age. 分析观点 Young adults may end up never returning to their studies or finding it difficult to readapt to an academic environment. They may think that it is better to continue in a particular job, or to do something completely different from a university course. 驳斥But overall, I think this is less likely today, when academic qualifications are essential for getting a reasonable career.

    【解析】

    · 压后分析“弊”的一面:中心句点出段落讨论核心“dangers”,再续以论证分析学生们可能不会回去学习或无法适应学习环境。

    · 立场是利大于弊,因此本段还给出了必要的驳斥:学历相当关键,所以学生不大可能放弃学业。

    · take time off 休假

      end up doing something 到头来...

      academic qualifications 学历

      get a reasonable career 找到相当不错的职业

    Conclusion

    My view is that young people should be encouraged to broaden their horizons. That is the best way for them to get a clear perspective of what they are hoping to do with their lives and why. Students with such a perspective are usually the most effective and motivated ones and taking a year off may be the best way to gain this.

    【解析】

    · 结尾总结上文的同时表态“利大于弊”,本部分要求清晰且不重复主体的措辞

    · broaden one’s horizon 拓宽视野

      get a clear perspective of 对…有更清晰的认识

    ·  END  ·

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