【老外说】养育孩子的关键是什么？

【老外说】是一档以“采访”老外为主的节目，帮助大家更好的了解中西文化差异，一窥英国人、美国人日常生活。每周一更新。本栏目适合精听/泛听。可做听写练习。

孩子的教育问题越来越成为社会关注的焦点，parenting已然成为了一个热门词汇，那么在这个过程中，最重要的是什么呢？让我们一起来听听这位老外跟我们分享她的经验吧！

Gwen

What do you think is the essence of parenting? 

Patience. Just you have to have patience. With those patience, when unexpected things happen, you just have to be patient and work through them. You can't just automatically react to everything that happens, because then you're gonna lose their trust. So I think the the key is to always be patient and think before you react. That way they know what to expect. They they know that no matter what happens, good or bad, you're going to be understanding and you're gonna be there for them, and you're going to work through it. 

That doesn't mean that they're going to get away with it, and there won't be consequences, but you're not going to act straightly out of impulse or emotion. You're going to think through it and make calm decisions. And I think that helps them feel confident that they can come to you without just automatic reactions. 

get away with it 做了某事而不受惩罚

So patient, that's something I definitely had to develop. And when Matthew was really little, any little thing that happened to him, I would get so emotional about it. If I thought something was gonna hurt him or if I thought he was doing something he shouldn't do or any little thing, I'd get so worked up about it. But over time I realized that wasn't doing anyone any good. And I realized how he responded more to me when I was calm. I kind of stayed quiet and just let him talk and just listened. I kind of develop that skill as he got older. It's proven to be true. And I I said I'm a teacher. So I have fifty students at school that I teach.And the same is true for them. They just need me to be a listening ear. I need to be calm and collected and patient, and it just makes them more comfortable. 

be worked up 激动

Gwen

That's definitely a good lesson to learn because I'm a mother too. I'm a mother of a five-year-old. I've come to realize that I sometimes lack of patience really, because I'm so busy with work. That is one reason of course, but I think it turns out to be an excuse sometimes because I'd rather stay alone and swipe the phone instead of talking with my child. So I think this is totally my fault, something I should definitely change.

swipe the phone 刷手机

 I'm very impressed with you saying that because I think that's something very hard for moms to admit. But I think we all feel the exact same way. We don't want to admit that. But it’s true. It's true for almost all of us. And I think it boils down to being a mom is hard. You know, it's hard. You can try your very best and there's no guarantee that it's going to be good enough. So it's easier for us to focus on our work or focus on our phone focus on things that are guaranteed. I know if I go to work and I do a good job, I will be rewarded with pay or whatever promotion. I can calculate that. And I can find security in that, but there's no guarantee with being a mom.You can do everything right and things still go wrong with your relationship with your kids. It's hard and it's scary. And so I totally respect you for saying that. 

boil down to 归结于，取决于

e.g. It could simply boil down to a lack of opportunity

这可以简单地归结为：缺少机会。

I think more women need to stand up and just give themselves a little bit of credit, give themselves a break because you know we all do our best as moms in our own way. And we tend to be so hard on ourselves and we really need to take a step back and give ourselves a break and say 'listen, this is hard, it's hard and it's OK that I'm not always at a hundred percent. That's OK because it's hard. Being a mom is a full time job. And we need to just give ourselves a little bit of credit for what we do.

give sb credit 称赞某人

to give someone credit means to give them praise

e.g. We must give credit to our sponsors who helped pay for this new building. 我们一定要称赞帮助我们购买这座新大楼的赞助商。

Gwen

Yeah, that's true. Thank you so much for talking with me. You know, I've definitely learned a lot.

每个妈妈都担心自己不够优秀，担心不能给孩子最好的教育，但是就像这位老外妈妈说的，“we all do our best as moms in our own way”，

我们都在以自己的方式，努力做到最好。

大家还想听“老外”说些什么？欢迎留言哦

-等你很久啦！-