Arthur aron 的36个问题

36 Questions to Bring You Closer Together
36个问题，让你们更紧密地联系在一起

Get to know someone and create a sense of intimacy, in as little as an hour.
在短短一个小时内了解某人并创造一种亲密感。

Posted October 15, 2013 |  Reviewed by Lybi Ma

·        Social psychology researcher Arthur Aron shared a list of questions that generate closeness between two people.
社会心理学研究员亚瑟·阿伦（Arthur Aron）分享了一系列在两个人之间产生亲密关系的问题。

·        Aron's results were published in "The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness" in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin (1997).
Aron的研究结果发表在《人格与社会心理学公报》（1997）的“人际亲密关系的实验一代”中。

·        Questions that bring people together cover various topics including friendship, death, sharing, and family.
将人们聚集在一起的问题涵盖了各种主题，包括友谊、死亡、分享和家庭。

These questions only take about 45 minutes to discuss—and they almost always make two people feel better about each other and want to see each other again, according to social psychology researcher Arthur Aron of the Interpersonal Relationships Lab at Stony Brook University in New York, who published his results in "The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness" in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin (1997).
这些问题只需要大约45分钟就可以讨论，而且它们几乎总是让两个人对彼此感觉更好，并希望再次见面，纽约石溪大学人际关系实验室的社会心理学研究员亚瑟·阿伦（Arthur Aron）在《人格与社会心理学公报》（Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin，1997）上发表了他的研究结果。

You can try these questions with a date, but they're not necessarily only applicable to fostering romance. You can also try them with people you already know well—friends, family members, even long-term partners—to deepen your ties.
你可以在约会时尝试这些问题，但它们不一定只适用于培养浪漫。你也可以和你已经熟悉的人——朋友、家人，甚至是长期伴侣——一起尝试，以加深你们的联系。

Each of you should take a turn answering each question. Here they are, in order:
你们每个人都应该轮流回答每个问题。它们在这里，按顺序排列：

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?
1. 如果世界上任何人可以选择，你会想让谁作为晚餐客人？

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
2. 你想出名吗？以什么方式？

3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
3. 在打电话之前，你有没有排练过你要说的话？为什么？

4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?
4. 对你来说，什么才是完美的一天？

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
5.你上一次给自己唱歌是什么时候？给别人？

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
6. 如果你能活到90岁，并在生命的最后60年保持30岁的身心，你会选择哪一个？

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
7.你对自己将如何死亡有秘密的预感吗？

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
8. 说出你和你的伴侣似乎有共同点的三件事。

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
9.在你的生活中，你最感激什么？

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
10.如果你能改变你的成长方式，那会是什么？

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
11. 花四分钟时间，尽可能详细地告诉你的伴侣你的人生故事。

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
12.如果你明天醒来时获得了一种品质或能力，那会是什么？

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
13.如果水晶球可以告诉你关于你自己、你的生活、未来或其他任何事情的真相，你想知道什么？

14. Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
14.有没有你梦寐以求的事情很久了？你为什么不做？

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
15.你一生中最大的成就是什么？

16. What do you value most in a friendship?
16.在友谊中，你最看重什么？

17. What is your most treasured memory?
17.你最珍贵的记忆是什么？

18. What is your most terrible memory?
18.你最可怕的记忆是什么？

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
19.如果你知道一年后你会突然死去，你会改变你现在的生活方式吗？为什么？

20. What does friendship mean to you?
20.友谊对你意味着什么？

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
21.爱和亲情在你的生活中扮演什么角色？

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
22. 交替分享一些你认为是伴侣积极特征的东西。总共分享 5 个项目。

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
23.你的家人有多亲密和温暖？你觉得你的童年比大多数人更快乐吗？

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
24.你如何看待你和母亲的关系？

25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."
25. 每人做三个真实的“我们”陈述。例如，“我们俩都在这个房间里，感觉......”

26. Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
26.完成这句话“我希望我有一个可以分享的人......”

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
27. 如果你要和你的伴侣成为亲密的朋友，请分享对他或她来说很重要的事情。

28. Tell your partner what you like about them. Be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
28. 告诉你的伴侣你喜欢他们的什么。这次要诚实，说一些你可能不会对你刚认识的人说的话。

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
29.与你的伴侣分享你生活中的一个尴尬时刻。

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
30.你最后一次在别人面前哭泣是什么时候？靠自己？

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
31. 告诉你的伴侣你已经喜欢他们的事情了。

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
32.如果有的话，什么太严重了，不能开玩笑？

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
33.如果你今晚死了，没有机会与任何人交流，你最后悔没有告诉别人什么？你怎么还不告诉他们？

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
34.你的房子，包含你拥有的一切，着火了。在拯救了您的亲人和宠物之后，您有时间安全地进行最后的冲刺以保存任何一件物品。那会是什么？为什么？

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
35.在你家里的所有人中，你觉得谁的死最令人不安？为什么？

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
36. 分享一个个人问题，并就他或她如何处理它征求你的伴侣的建议。另外，请你的伴侣向你反映你对你所选择的问题的感受。