恋爱宝典：初次约会应避免的十个错误http://www.sina.com.cn 2009年09月22日 09:26 新浪教育
10 First-date mistakes Thebest thing about bad dates is that we walk away with a great story, andlittle doubt that the perpetrator is not the person for us。 I wasthinking about some of the common errors made on first dates. I came upwith 10 common mistakes that could kill the chances for a second date: Arriving late Evenfive minutes of lateness is inexcusable on the first date. People arealready anxious on these excursions, so making someone wait and thinkmore about everything is pretty rude. Seems like the trend in NYC is tobe late for things regularly. On one date, I texted the girl and toldher I was running late. She said she was too. We ended up just havingthe date 1/2 hour later than planned and technically no one was latebecause we were both 1/2 hour late together。 Wardrobe malfunction Makesure you cater what you wear to what you're doing. I try not to make agirl walk too much if she's in heels. Also, I've seen girls wear pearlsand a nice blouse to trashy outdoor drinking events, or heels tosporting events。 Talking politics or religion Stayingaway from debatable content is a good idea the first time out. It's funto argue with your significant other, but I think it's important toreach a comfort level first. If you try to proselytize someone, orbattle them over a hot topic like abortion, you may reach a point of noreturn。 Checking out other people You'd think that noone would do this, but guys are always looking at waitresses, or otherpatrons when out. One of my friends got in hot water because his datetold me he made cat calls at other girls while on a date. Talk about amistake! Bringing friends (Non group date) If youbring friends along you look immature and insecure. You also throw theother person for a loop if they were expecting the date to beone-on-one. Make sure you establish that it is a one-on-one date, andfollow the rules and show up alone。 Getting too drunk Somepeople turn into a completely different person when they are drunk. Letthe other person learn about you while you're sober, before you getwasted with them. Alcohol should be introduced into the relationshipslowly, but if a drink or two takes the edge off, and wine adds romanceit's fine. Just don't push it too far。 Being too aggressive Noone wants to deal with someone's wandering hands before they are ready.It is one of the best ways to creep someone out. Just because someoneis getting dinner with someone once doesn't mean it's an invitationinto the sack. It's best to be hands off on the first date。 Being too unaggressive Myfriend Margaret warns me to be more aggressive all the time. She saidthat if I don't kiss someone at the end of a date, or make a move whenthey hop in my bed they will begin to think something's wrong withthem, or that I'm not into them. Maybe that's true, but sometimes I amjust being too safe so that I don't break the rule I just mentionedabove。 Canceling at the last minute or standing someone up Cancelingfor a legitimate reason is fine, but respect your date's time so thatthey can plan their night without you. Canceling one hour before a dateis not cool — most of the date prep has already started at this point.Standing someone up is so rude. What does it accomplish? If you changeyour mind, at least have the strength to just cancel. No need to makesomeone feel bad and waste their time just because you're too chickento cancel the date。 Dominant speaker Try to breathe inbetween sentences, and don't talk too much. Give your date a chance totalk. Aren't you trying to get to know one another? And don't speak forthat other person (i.e. order for them at dinner) unless they inviteyou to help with their order。 Do you agree or disagree withany of these? Ever have these happen to you, or have you ever madethese mistakes? Would you go on a second date after any of thesemistakes? What would you add to this list? |
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