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女士们考虑把我们的孩子放到第一位，对吗？如果你问我，在YourTango 网的一项单身母亲的民意调查会给你令人安慰的答案。25%的单身母亲或是离婚母亲没有爱或没有关系的性并感到这样有助于她们有性生活的发展。然而，13%的回应者认为没有爱或是承诺是不会发生性关系的，所以自我抑制。 Oh boy. 13% of you could be waiting a long time… 哦，孩子。13%的单身母亲要等更长的时间…… Related: How I Learned About Sex: A lesson in what not to do 讲述：怎样学习性：不该做的经验 I'm a divorced, single mother. After I split with my ex, I was so broken down emotionally, sex was the last thing on my mind. I know some people (especially men) are able to jump out of their marriages into multiple beds, but I didn't. Because I couldn't. But eventually I did want to start having sex again, and so I waited until the right moment came along and had a perfectly bland textbook one-night stand. And I'm so happy it happened that way. His semi-hard whiskey dick provided exactly the gentle nudge I needed to get back in the game. (He was lovely, the whole thing lovely and very sweet really, but in hindsight I think he may have been married. No ring though. Not my fault!) 我是个离婚的单身母亲。在我和前夫离婚后，我的情绪非常低落，性是我脑子里唯一剩下的东西。我知道一些人（尤其是男人）有婚外情，但我没有。因为我不能。但最终我想再次开始性生活，所以我等待知道那个对的时刻到来一个完美单调的一夜的停留。我乐于以这样的方式进行。他的半硬的阴茎给我恰到好处轻柔的刺激，那正式我想得到的。（他是可爱的，整件事情都是甜蜜而富有爱意的，但是事后，我想他可能已经结婚了。但没有看到他的戒指，不是我的错。） Anyway, the great thing about co-parenting with an ex is that it allows you both to have sexy time. (With other people. Not with each other. That's something you should never do! Though I did think about it once. I asked my ex to have sex with me and he said okay, but then we started talking and I made him cry about how he'd mistreated me, and that was so much better than an orgasm.) A few weeks after I popped my divorce cherry, I saw the opportunity for another one-nighter and took advantage. Eventually I started dating someone, and though it didn't work out long-term, we had so much sex. Makeup sex. Not the kind of sex you have after a fight, the kind of sex you have after you haven't had that kind of sex for years. The kind of sex that makes you happy to be alive. The kind of sex that makes you want to let your kid have ice cream for breakfast. The kind of sex where you're angry and crying and laughing all at the same time! (Oh, just me? Okay.) 不管怎样，和前夫共同养育子女最棒的事是可以有迷人的性感时间。（和其他人，不是和某人彼此。那是你从没做过的事！虽然我只想过一次。我请求我的前夫和我做爱，他说好，但是后来我们开始谈话我谈到他不公的对待使他大叫，这比性高潮更好。）离婚后的几个礼拜，我看到了另一个一夜情的机会并抓住机会。最终我开始和人约会，即使这不是长期有效，我们做了很多次。做爱，不是在争吵后的那种性，是那种在你很多年都没发生过性后的那种。它是你感到愉悦和活着的乐趣。这种性使你想让你的孩子用冰淇淋当早餐。这种性使你在同一时间生气，狂叫，大笑。（好吧，这就是我吗？） Related: 10 reasons he still wants sex while you're pregnant 讲述：当你怀孕是他还要做爱的十个原因 Now that we've stopped seeing each other, I don't know when I'll have sex again, and I don't really care. I like sex as much or more than the next guy, but I have to feel comfortable with someone to have sex with them, so that means really random one-nighters are out of the question. (And probably aren't very safe, anyway.) YourTango suggests "friends with benefits" as a healthy solution, but I don't know. So many of my gal pals have stories of those types of relationships going wrong. The common notion is, "someone always gets hurt," because it's hard to have sex without getting emotional (just nod your head and play along, fellas). So I guess I'll just have to wait this one out and see what happens. When my daughter's away, maybe I'll go to a movie with one of those moms who's abstaining 'til she finds true love. I'm sure she could use a pick me up. 既然我们已经停下来看看彼此，我不知道什么时候在要做爱，我也不关心。我想有比跟下个人更多的性，但我和他们做爱要感到舒服，那意味着一夜情不在话下。（不管怎样可能不是很安全。） YourTango 网上说炮友像是健康隐患，但我不这么认为。很多我的女友这种类型的关系变得不好。普遍的观念是总有人受伤，因为很难没有感情而发生性（只是点头之交一块玩乐的伙伴）。所以我想我必须等待这个人出现然后看能发生什么。当我女儿离开时，也许我会和以为不找到真爱就自我抑制的单身母亲去看电影。我确定她会时常带上我。1 |
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