细数男人出轨21大表现

Every woman in a relationship worries about infidelity, but unless he stumbles in late at night smelling like cheap perfume, it can be tough to tell whether your man is having an affair. Thankfully, our experts are here to help. Below are some of the ways you can discern whether you're just being jealous or he's actually up to no good.
处于恋爱中的女人都会担心另一半出轨，但是除非他很晚才慢悠悠地回家，而且身上还带着廉价的香水味，要不然想知道你的男人是否出轨是很难的。幸好有专家在这儿给我们支招。下面就是一些方法，来帮助你判断自己到底只是在疑神疑鬼还是他真的在做坏事。

1. He takes or makes phone calls in private. Although there may be a need for privacy when taking or making phone calls, if your partner retreats to the other room every time the phone rings, there may be something more going on, especially if this behavior is new or has suddenly become more frequent.
他偷偷地接打电话。尽管在接打电话时的确可能需要一个私人空间，但是如果每次电话铃响时，你的另一半都要退到另一个房间接电话，那么他可能还有别的事瞒着你，尤其是如果他以前不是这样的，或者这种现象最近突然发生得更频繁了。

2. He deletes the text history on his phone. Most people do not bother deleting old text messages … at least not until the phone is full. If your partner makes sure that old messages are deleted — or worse — he deletes them as soon as he finishes a conversation with someone, there may be more going on than just texting.
2. 他删掉手机上的短信记录。大多数人都不会去删除以前的短信，至少在手机存储量满之前不会这么做。如果你的另一半需要确保旧短信已经被删除——或者更糟糕的是——他一聊完就马上删除它们，那么他可能不只是在发短信。

3. He maintains multiple e-mail or social media accounts. If you discover additional or hidden e-mail or social media sites, things are almost certainly not good. Simply put, people in committed relationships have no need to maintain accounts that their partners don't know about. If you discover one of these, it is time to be concerned.
3. 他有好几个邮箱或者其他社交网络账号。如果你发现了其他的或者被隐藏起来的邮箱、社交网站，那么情况通常都不太乐观。简单来说，一个对爱情忠诚的人是不需要拥有另一半不知道的账号的。如果你发现了其中一个，就应该重视起来。

4. He avoids family or other social events. Infidelity, whether physical or emotional, will always result in lost time with friends and family. If your partner avoids social gatherings or activities, leaves early or arrives late because of some project or task, there may be a strong chance that he is spending time with someone else, whether on the phone, the computer, or in person.
4. 他避开一些家庭或者其他社交聚会。无论是生理还是心理上的背叛，总是会导致失去和朋友、家人相聚的时间。如果你的另一半开始避开一些社交聚会、活动，或者因为一些项目、工作而迟到、早退，那么很有可能他和别人在交往，或者是在电话里，或者是在电脑上，更有可能是面对面的。

5. He suddenly spends tons of time with another person. If your partner is suddenly spending a lot of time with a colleague, co-worker, friend or even an acquaintance, particularly if that person is of the opposite sex, you may want to learn more about this relationship and the possibility that there may be an affair going on. –
5. 他突然花很多时间和另一个人在一起。如果你的另一半突然花很多时间和一个同事、搭档、朋友，甚至是一个熟人在一起，特别是如果这个人是异性，那么你可能会想多了解这段关系，看看有没有可能他们在搞外遇。

6. He gives gifts or frequently volunteers to help another person. Although it is nice to give gifts and do kind things for friends, family members and even strangers, if your partner frequently gives gifts, especially those that are costly, take time and effort to prepare or have significant meaning, or volunteers to help out with projects around the home, this may be a sign that he is having an emotional affair.
6. 他送给另一个人礼物，或者时常主动帮助那个人。尽管给朋友、家人，甚至是陌生人礼物或者提供帮助是一件很棒的事情，但如果你的另一半时常送礼物，尤其是送一些很贵重的，有重要意义的，需要花很多时间和精力去准备的礼物，或者主动帮忙做一些家里面的事情，那么这很有可能表明他有婚外情。

7. You notice a different scent on him. Whether it's another woman's perfume or possibly a different brand of soap from showering elsewhere, your senses know things. If he's coming home freshly showered after a full day of work, the same way he left for work, you may have a hint he's having an affair.
7. 你注意到他身上有不一样的气味。不管是别的女人的香水味，还是在其他地方洗澡后留下的别的牌子的香皂味，你的嗅觉能知道发生了什么。如果工作了一天后，他是洗完澡回家的，就像早上离开家时一样，那么你可能得到了一个提示，那就是他有了外遇。

8. He doesn't touch you as much. Sometimes affection drops off a bit due to poor communication, unresolved issues or a recent argument. If this is unexplained behavior or he is repelling you with odd excuses, you may have a hint. At minimum, you have an issue in your relationship that needs to be addressed honestly.
8. 他触摸你的次数没有以前那么多。有时候，感情会因为缺乏沟通、没有解决的问题或者一次刚发生的争吵而变淡。如果这是一个无法解释的举动，或者他因为一些奇怪的理由拒绝你，那么你就得到了一些暗示。至少在你们的关系中，你们需要诚实地处理一个问题。

9. He dresses differently. Has your husband started to dress a little differently or does he keep his vehicle a bit cleaner? Has he been acting slightly happier and more cooperative, yet all of a sudden he is busier and just leaving the house more often? (e.g. going out more often with "friends," running more errands, etc.) If so, take heed. Take interest in his new activity/involvement if you're curious about what's really going on.
9. 他的穿衣打扮变得不一样。你的老公是否开始穿得和以前不一样？或者他是不是让车子比以前更干净？他是不是表现得开心了一点，更合作了一点？他是不是突然更忙了，而且出门更频繁了？（比如，常常和“朋友”出去，需要处理更多的事情，等等。）如果这样的话，你要注意了。如果你想知道发生了什么，可以多观察他的新参与的活动。

10. He's gone longer. Does your man usually take the dog out for a half hour run every day, but now it's a 60-90 minute walk-run? Who is he running into all of a sudden at the dog park or in the neighborhood? If it's not "chatty Kathy," he may be having an affair. Go with him once in a while.
10. 他出去的时间变长了。你的老公是不是以前每天遛狗遛半个小时，但现在却要60-90分钟？他突然在狗狗公园或者附近遇到谁了？如果不是“爱讲闲话的凯西”，那么他可能有外遇。偶尔跟他一起去吧。

11. He picks fights. Is your husband starting arguments that end up in him leaving the house a lot? Are his garments coming up missing here and there? If so, something is going on!
11. 他常常和你吵架。你的老公是不是常常挑起矛盾，而且最后多以他离家出走而告终？他的衣服是不是常常找不到？如果真的是这样的话，有事发生了！

12. He's being extra secretive. When your husband suddenly has a change in his privacy attitude — all of a sudden you're not supposed to know his whereabouts or who he's talking to on the phone and it's not close to your birthday, anniversary or upcoming gift-giving holiday — he may be having an affair.
12. 他老是神秘兮兮的。当你的老公突然对个人隐私的态度有了转变时——你突然就不应该知道他在哪儿，他在跟谁打电话，而且这也不是发生在临近你的生日、你们的纪念日或者到了要送礼物的时候——他可能有外遇。

13. There is a change in the emotional quality of your relationship. This may be shown as your partner is unengaged or overly engaged. We all go through emotional changes, like the weather. However, you may notice that your partner's attitude has changed toward you over time; they may have become more self-absorbed and less interested in you or the relationship. Often, your partner may reject your offers of affection. Your best approach here is to pay attention and be curious.
13. 你们之间的感情发生了变化。这一点会在你的另一半对事情不投入或者过分投入的时候表现出来。我们都经历过情绪上的变化，比如天气造成的。但是，经过一段时间后，你会注意到你的另一半对你的态度也发生了变化。他们可能变得更以自我为中心，对你或者你们之间的关系的兴趣有所减弱。你的另一半可能常常拒绝你表达的爱意。这时，你最好的做法就是多关注他，保持好奇心。

14. He's extremely angry. Anger and criticism that borders on cruelty is hard to take for all of us. Your partner may treat you with rudeness or impatience. He may be more controlling and more critical than usual. You may sense an increase in the degree of unhappiness in your spouse that is difficult to understand. With some partners, you may actually see an increase in happiness as a result of being involved in an affair.
14. 他非常生气。我们每个人都无法忍受近似于残忍的愤怒和指责。你的另一半可能会对你很粗鲁、很不耐烦。他可能比平时更有控制欲，也更挑剔。你可能觉察到你的另一半越来越不开心，而且你也理解不了这是为什么。其实在很多情侣身上，你可以看到如果有外遇的话，他就会变得开心。

15. You notice an increase in his work or his time spent away from home. Work can be demanding. During these times of economic stress, most workplaces are demanding more and more from their employees. Workplace relationships can develop into romantic relationships simply because the amount of time spent together on a common task tends to bond people together. If your partner has trouble with boundaries, this could lead to a problem for your relationship.
16. 你注意到他的工作量增加了，或者你在外面的时间变多了。工作是很费力费时的。在目前的经济压力下，大多数公司对员工的要求越来越多。仅仅因为要完成同一个任务，所以两个人相处的时间就会增加，这样的话，工作关系也可以发展成为恋爱关系。如果你的另一半很难划清工作和恋爱的界限，那么这就可能使你们的关系出现问题。

16. He pays an unusual amount of attention to his appearance. This would be especially telling if up until now, your partner has not shown much attention to his appearance. If your partner is having an affair, he has found a new source of love and affection. Looking good for his paramour is very important.
16. 他过分地关注自己的外表。如果到目前为止，你的另一半都不太关注自己的外表，那么这一点是很能说明问题的。如果你的另一半有外遇，他就找到了一个新的表达爱慕的对象。所以，在他的情人前表现得好一点是很重要的。

17. He's overly defensive. Defensiveness exists for many reasons. In the past, were you able to discuss issues openly and calmly? What you are looking for here is an increase in the normal amount of defensiveness.
17. 他变得过分地保护自我。自我防御是由很多原因造成的。过去你们是不是可以开放地、冷静地讨论问题？这里你要注意的就是这种自我防御性的增加程度。

18. His appearance has changed. Your partner, who previously dressed conservatively, is now suddenly buying designer boxer shorts and more trendy clothes. Or, your partner, who never spent much time grooming himself, is now fussy about how his hair looks and uses grooming products he's never used before.
18. 他的打扮改变了。他以前穿得很保守，但现在突然开始买有牌子的四角短裤和更时尚的衣服。或者，他以前从不花时间打扮自己，现在却开始烦恼发型看起来怎么样，开始用一些以前从来不用的美容产品。

19. His behavior has changed. Your partner, who usually avoided office parties and events, is now constantly attending them "for the sake of his career." Or, your partner suddenly takes up and becomes obsessed with a new hobby or sport that keeps him away from home. Or, your partner who usually is home for dinner every night now "works late" and takes more frequent "business trips."
19. 他的举动改变了。他以前通常都会避开办公室聚会和活动，但现在常常因为“要保住工作”而参加这些活动。或者，他突然变得对一个爱好或者运动很着迷，这样他就能常常有理由不在家。又或者，他以前每晚都回家吃晚饭，但现在却“工作到很晚”，而且还常常“出差”。

20. His attitude has changed. Your laid back partner seems to have been injected with unusual enthusiasm, seems more happy, alive, energetic and is more kind and loving towards you, too. He may buy you more gifts and shower you with surprises, which, until now, has not been his natural character.
20. 他的态度改变了。他以前是很懒散的，但现在貌似被打了鸡血一样，变得更开心，更活泼，更有活力，对你也更好了。他可能还给你买很多的礼物，给你惊喜，这些表现到目前为止都不是他的本性使然。

21. He wants less "we time" and more "me time." When you got together as a couple, you consciously or unconsciously negotiated how much "me time" you would have and how much "we time" you as a couple would have. Now, you are noticing a shift from "we" to your partner wanting much more "me" time. You aren't included to the degree you used to be in your partner's extra-curricular activities.
21. 他想要少一些“我们在一起的时间”，多一些“自己的时间”。当你们在一起的时候，总会自觉或者不自觉地商量你会有多少“自己的时间”，你们有多少“属于情侣的时间”。现在，你会发现你的另一半想要更多“自己的时间”，而不是“我们在一起的时间”。你不再像以前一样，被算在他的额外活动中。（英文来源：Huffingtonpost）

143

55