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- Wednesday- 对话框回复“早安”或者“morning'，获取清晨元气满满的英文金句  为什么另一半会出轨？
Usually, affair is seen as outcomes of lasciviousness or just nasty. That’s very rarely the case. 通常，出轨会被认为是好色或者人品渣渣的结果。但事实却并非如此。
When it comes to affairs, we spend far too long to criticize or be secretive, and far too little time trying to understand.In truth, affair stands from a very subtle aspect of romantic psychology. 一提起外遇，人们总是花太多时间去指责和隐瞒，却很少花时间去理解。事实上，外遇属于恋爱心理学中很微妙的一部分。 In the relationship with a partner, all of us have two different needs. 在与另一半的交往中，我们每一个人都有两种不同的需求。
We have a need for closeness, and a need for distance. We want a part of closeness to feel we can huge, touch and entirely relaxing in a home with someone. We want them to know our thoughts and want to feel their minds too. 我们有亲密感的需求，也有距离感的需求。我们想要有亲密的感觉，拥抱、触碰、完全放松地与另一半待在家里。我们想让对方了解我们，也想去了解他们。
But we also need distance enough, not feel closely tired or owned by another. We want return to a sense of freedom. We need a private room to which we alone have the key. 但是，我们同样需要足够的距离感，而不想感到完全被另一半捆住或者从属于对方。我们会想要回归到自由的感觉，需要有一个属于自己的空间。 Any imbalance towards over closeness or over distance may prove catastrophic, if left unnoticed. 两人若是过于亲密或者过于疏远，如果不理睬，这就会对彼此间的关系造成极大的伤害。 In a relationship, which threatened to lean toward over close, we can be driven to strain by powerful urge to prove ourselves that not everything we do and are is owned by a partner, that we remain desirable to the world. 在交往过程中，如果被过度依赖，我们就会产生强烈的冲动，想要证明我们所做的以及我们自身并不完全属于另一半，我们仍旧充满魅力。 Going to a bed with new person might not simply be about lust, is about escaping the alarming feeling that one’s own identity appears to be on deserving to a couple. 出轨并不是简单的风流问题，而是我们想要逃离由自我身份危机而带来的焦躁感。
But too much distance can undermine a relationship powerfully. 但是，太过疏远也会对恋人间的关系造成巨大的打击。
The distance reads like constant rejections, when we try to touch the partner, they move away or sign; when bring out something personal, they change the subject. 距离在另一半看来会是不断地被拒绝。当我们想要抚摸对方时，他（她）们挪开或者叹气；当我们谈到一些私密的事情时，他（她）们转移了话题。
We may have affair not because we don’t love the partner anymore, but precisely because we do. And yet the distance that they appear to impose on us though lack of engagement feels insecure and humiliating. 我们会出轨，可能并不是因为我们不再爱对方了，而恰恰是因为我们很爱对方。但是对方给我们的距离感让我们觉得缺乏安全感，并感到被羞辱了。
It’s the final irony that if caught, we would be accused not caring. While it was caring too much that might inspire the escapade as a paid. 最讽刺的是，出轨被捉时，我们会被指责不爱对方。但实际上爱得太多，反而也可能会导致出轨。
Painfully, two people almost never into a relationship with same needs for closeness or distance. That’s why every couple would hear the accusation that one person too clingy and another is too cold. 令人难过的是，交往中的两个人对亲密感和距离感的需求几乎都不相同。这也就是为什么每一对恋人都会听到这样的指责：一方太过粘人，而另一方太过冷淡。
These are wrong and cruel words. For what are our hearts, they are just two different ways of feeling comfortable in love. 这样的话是不对的，并且是很伤人的。本质上来说，那只是使我们在爱情中感到舒服的两种不同的方式。 It’s imperative in any relationship to work out what the relative needs for distance and closeness actually are. To add disjunction, not disagree with it. And mutually, with good humor, apologize for one’s disturbing contribution to it. 在任何一段关系中，清楚彼此对距离和亲密的真实需求是十分重要的。找到两人的不同，并接受这些不同，而不是对此争吵不休。并且，在给对方造成困扰时，能够用一种幽默的方式相互道歉。 Only thus can we hope to ensure the gap won’t lead an on-line chatting, a night bar or a little conference to a situation that only affair feels like a possible solution to dealing with problems of distance and closeness. 只有这样，我们才能够确保，两个人对距离感和亲密感的不同需求之间的差异不会导致另一半与别人网聊、泡吧或者开工作会议，并将出轨当成处理两人之间存在差异的解决办法。 编辑：梦琪 |
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