What is holding people back from the life that they truly want to live?
什么阻碍了人们过他们真正想要过的生活？
I’d say that one very common and destructive thing is that they think too much.
我想说一个非常普遍而且有害的原因:想的太多。
In this article I would like to share 9 habits that have helped me in a big, big way to become a simpler and smarter thinker and to live a happier and less fearful life.
在这篇文章中，我想要分享对我非常有帮助的9个习惯，它们帮助我成为一个更简单更聪明的思考者，帮我过上一个更愉快、担忧少的生活。
1. Put things into a wider perspective.
1.用更宽的角度看待事物
It is very easy to fall into the trap of overthinking minor things in life.
在日常生活琐事中想太多简直太平常了。
So when you are thinking and thinking about something ask yourself:
所以当你在思考，在考虑某件事的时候，你要问问自己：
Will this matter in 5 years? Or even in 5 weeks?
这事在五年后还要紧吗？或者在五周后呢？
I have found that widening the perspective by using this simple question can snap me quickly out of overthinking and help me to let that situation go and focus my time and energy on something that actually does matter to me.
我已经发现，从更广阔的角度和用此类简单的问题，能让我迅速远离想太多的境地，还能让我顺其自然，把时间和精力放在对我真正有意义的事情上。
2. Set short time-limits for decisions.
2.为做决定设一个短的时间限制。
If you do not have a time-limit for when you must make a decision and take action then you can just keep turning your thoughts around and around and view them from all angles in your mind for a very long time.
当必须做出一个决定或者采取行动时，如果你没有为这件事做一个时间限制，那么你就会一直不断地在这个问题上打转，从所有的角度上来观察它，这将耗费你非常长的一段时间。
So learn to become better at making decisions and to spring into action by setting deadlines in your daily life. No matter if it is a small or bigger decision.
因此学会更好的做决定然后立刻根据在日常生活中设立最后期限作出行动。不管这是大还是小的决定。
Here’s what have worked for me.
这里是一些对我有用的方法：
?For small decisions like if should go and do the dishes, respond to an email or work out I usually give myself 30 seconds or less to make a decision.
像我是不是应该去洗碟子、去回复邮件或者出去锻炼这样的小问题，我常常给自己30秒或者更少的时间去作出决定。
?For somewhat larger decisions that would have taken me days or weeks to think through in the past I use a deadline for 30 minutes or for the end of the workday.
对一些更大的事情而言，过去要花费个几天或者几周的时间来考虑，现在我就给自己30分钟时间，或者就只是一天工作结束的那个时候。
3. Become a person of action.
3.做一个行动者
When you know how to get started with taking action consistently each day then you’ll procrastinate less by overthinking.
当你知道每天该如何不断地付诸行动，那么你不会因为想太多而耽误事情。
Setting deadlines is one thing that have helped me to become much more of person of action.
设置最后期限帮助我成为了一个行动者。
Taking small steps forward and only focusing on getting one small step done at a time is another habit that have worked really well.
小步走向前，只关注每次走的一小步是另外一个很有用的方法。
It works so well because you do not feel overwhelmed and so you do not want flee into procrastination. And even though you may be afraid, taking just a step is such a small thing that you do not get paralyzed in fear.
它如此有效，因为你不会感到受打击，因此你也不会在拖延里到处逃避。尽管你也许会感到害怕，只是走一小步是使你不在恐惧中失去勇气的一件小事情。
4. Realize that you cannot control everything.
4.意识到你不能控制一切
Trying to think things through 50 times can be a way to try to control everything. To cover every eventuality so you do not risk making a mistake, fail or looking like a fool.
把每件事都想上50遍是试图控制一切的表现。为了把握每一个可能性，你不冒险去犯错，不去失败，甚至不会表现得想个傻子一样。
But those things are a part of living a life where you truly stretch your comfort zone. Everyone who you may admire and have lived a life that inspires you has failed. They have made mistakes.
但是这些事情是你生活的一部分，生活中你确实可以感受到舒适的空间。你崇拜的人或者过着激励你的生活的人也失败过，他们都会犯错。
But in most cases they have also seen these things as valuable feedback to learn from. Those things that may look negative have taught them a lot and have been invaluable to help them to grow.
但是在大多数情况下，他们也视这些事情为值得学习的有价值的回馈。这些或许看起来是消极的事教会他们很多，也是帮助他们的成长的无价的事。
So stop trying to control everything. Trying to do so simply doesn’t work because no one can see all possible scenarios in advance.
所以，停止尝试掌控所有事吧。做一些不管用的简单事情，因为没有人能够提前看到所有的可能性。
This is of course easier said than done. So do it in small steps if you like.
当然，这也是说起来简单做起来难。所以，如果你喜欢，那就分成小步慢慢来吧。
5. Say stop in situation where you know you cannot think straight.
5.在你不能想清楚的情况下对你自己喊停
Sometimes when I am hungry or when I am lying in bed and are about to go to sleep negative thoughts start buzzing around in my mind.
有时，当我饿的时候，躺在床上的时候或者马上要睡觉的时候，一些消极的想法就会开始在我脑子里嗡嗡回响。
In the past they could do quite a bit of damage. Nowadays I have become good at catching them quickly and to say to myself:
过去，它们确实给我带来了一些伤害。如今我能够很好的控制住它们，然后对自己说：
No, no, we are not going to think about this now.
不，不，我们现在不需要想这个。
I know that when I am hungry or sleepy then my mind sometimes tend to be vulnerable to not thinking clearly and to negativity.
我知道人饿了或者困了的时候比较虚弱，想东西也容易想不清楚，还会老往负面上想。
So I follow up my “no, no…” phrase and I say to myself that I will think this situation or issue through when I know that my mind will work much better.
所以我就跟着我那个“不不……”的思路往前走，告诉自己，还是等到脑子清醒些的时候再来考虑这个处境或者这个问题吧。
For example, after I have eaten something or in the morning after I have gotten my hours of sleep.
比如，当我吃饱了之后，或者早上起来睡饱了的时候。
It took a bit of practice to get this to work but I have gotten pretty good at postponing thinking in this way. And I know from experience that when I revisit a situation with some level-headed thinking then in 80% of the cases the issue is very small to nonexistent.
我做了一些锻炼使它得以工作但是我变得相当擅长于用这种方法推迟思考。从经验中我已经明白，当我用清醒的脑子来重新看问题时，80%的问题都不再是个问题。
And if there is a real issue then my mind is prepared to deal with it in much better and more constructive way.
如果真的存在问题，那么我的大脑已经准备好用更好更有建设性的方法来解决它了。
6. Do not get lost in vague fears.
6.不要在未知的恐惧中迷失
Another trap that I have fallen into many times that have spurred on overthinking is that I have gotten lost in vague fears about a situation in my life. And so my mind running wild has created disaster scenarios about what could happen if I do something.
另外一个我陷入很多次并且促使我过度担忧思考的困境是在我的生活的一个情况中，我迷失在了迷糊的恐惧之中。所以我的思想天马行空，编造了很多如果我做了某事就会发生的灾难性的情景。
So I have learned to ask myself: honestly, what is the worst that could happen?
然后我就学会了这么自问：说实在的，到底能有多糟？
And when I have figured out what the worst that could happen actually is then I can also spend a little time to think about what I can do if that often pretty unlikely thing happens.
当我搞清楚了最糟到底会发生什么，那么我也会花点时间想想要是真遇上这么档子事我该怎么办。
I have found that the worst that could realistically happen is usually something that is not as scary as what my mind running wild with vague fear could produce.
我发现那些最坏的打算在现实中真的发生的话，通常是这件事并没有我因为模糊的恐惧感而疯狂的思想所编造出来的那么吓人。
Finding clarity in this way usually only takes a few minutes of time and bit of energy and it can save you a lot of time and suffering.
这样弄清楚通常只需要几分钟的时间和一点点的精力，但是却可以节约你很多的时间和苦恼。
7. Work out.
7.锻炼
This might sound a bit odd.
这听起来可能有些奇怪。
But in my experience working out – especially with lifting weights – can help me to let go of inner tensions and worries.
但是在我的经历中，锻炼——尤其是举重——可以帮助我驱除内心的恐惧和担忧。
It most often makes me feel more decisive and when I was more of an overthinker then it was often my go-to method of changing the headspace I was in to a more constructive one.
锻炼让我更有魄力，当我杞人忧天的时候，我就用这个办法，来让我的脑子变得更有建设性。
8. Spend more of your time in the present moment.
8.花更多的时间在当下时刻
By being in the present moment in your everyday life rather than in the past or a possible future in your mind you can replace more and more of the time you usually spend on overthinking things with just being here right now instead.
让你的思想停留在你日常生活的每一个现在，而不是过去或者可能的未来。这样你能替代并好好利用你过去通常花在过度担忧，而止步不前上的时间。
Three ways that I often use to reconnect with the present moment are:
我通常用的三个让我与现在的时刻重新连接的方法：
?Slow down. Slow down how you do whatever you are doing right now. Move slower, talk slower or ride your bicycle more slowly for example. By doing so you become more aware of how you use your body and what is happening all around you right now.
慢下来。让你现在做的任何事都慢下来。比如，走慢点，交谈慢些或者骑行慢些。这样做，你会意识到你在怎样使用你的身体以及你周边正在发生着什么。
?Tell yourself: Now I am… I often tell myself this: Now I am X. And X could be brushing my teeth. Taking a walk in the woods. Or doing the dishes. This simple reminder helps my mind to stop wandering and brings my focus back to what is happening in this moment.
告诉你自己：现在我是……我经常告诉我自己：现在我是X。X也许在刷牙，也许在森林里漫步，也许在洗碗。这让我停止走神，将注意力转移到当下正在发生的事情上。
?Disrupt and reconnect. If you feel you are getting lost in overthinking then disrupt that thought by – in your mind – shouting this to yourself : STOP! Then reconnect with the present moment by taking just 1-2 minutes to focus fully on what is going on around you. Take it all in with all your senses. Feel it, hear it, smell it, see it and sense it on your skin.
打断然后重新连接。如果你感觉到你自己将在过度思考中迷失，那么你就打断你的想法——在你的大脑中——对你自己喊道：停！然后花个一两分钟，重新和正在发生的事情建立联系。全身心去做。感受它，听到它，闻到它，看见它并且感受它在你皮肤上的感觉。
9. Spend more of your time with people who do not overthink things.
9.花更多的时间与那些不会过度思考的人待在一起。
Your social environment plays a big part. And not just the people and groups close to you in real life. But also what you read, listen to and watch. The blogs, books, forums, movies, podcasts and music in your life.
你的社会环境会起到很大的作用。并不是你现实生活中身边的人或团体。还包括了你读到的，听到的，看到的东西。你生活中的博客，书本，广播节目，电影，博客以及音乐。
So think about if there are any sources in your life – close by or further away – that encourages and tends create more overthinking in your mind. And think about what people or sources that has the opposite effect on you.
那么，想想你的生活中，不论是远的还是近的，那些容易刺激你想太多的资源，想一下在哪些人和资源对你有消极影响。
Find ways to spend more of your time and attention with the people and sources that have a positive effect on your thinking and less on the influences that tends to strengthen your overthinking habit.
找些办法，把你的时间和精力更多地花在后者身上，他们才能给你的思考方式带来积极作用，而不是靠近前者，那只能让你这个想太多的毛病更加恶化。
讨论：什么阻碍了你过真正想要过的生活？ |
|
