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C: Conflict 冲突
It’s a source of pain on any team, and even any relationship. 往往是团队，甚至关系中痛苦的来源。
But what if the conflict was not good or bad? 但是如果冲突没有好坏之分呢？
S: What if the conflict was an inner resource for creativity, vision and transformation? 如果冲突是一种能够转化为创造力、愿景和蜕变的内在资源呢？  请点击上图，进入《关系：界限、健康、在冲突中成长》
C: Susan and I have been over 15 years working with hundreds of business leaders and their teams. 我和苏珊一起共同工作了15年，与成千上百的商业领袖和他们的团队合作过。
Our clients actually call us Team Doctors. 我们的客户叫我们“团队医生”。
Because we focus on the health of the team in order to get smart business results. 因为我们专注于团队的健康发展，进而取得卓越的商业成果。
S: There’s one that referred to us as the dentist. 曾经有一个客户把我们称作“牙医”。
C: That’s true. 确有其事
S: I think she just takes the conflict not us. 我认为她说的是冲突，不是我们。
C: What’s so. She keeps bringing this back. 的确如此，她经常提起这件事。
C: Have you ever been on the team where two people won’t deal with each other so you had to manage around them? 你是否曾经在这样的团队里工作？两个人不愿意彼此合作，所以你必须一直在他们身旁进行协调。
S: Have you worked with someone you just wanted to be able to have a good debate and they kept taking it so personally. 你是否曾经跟这样的人一起共事？你只是想和对方好好地讨论一件事情，他们却总是认为你在针对他们个人。
C: Or have you ever worked with somebody who had always got bad and can we just get along? 还是你曾经和这样的人一起工作？你们总是处不来，为什么就不能好好相处呢？
In these situations, you might think conflict is the problem. 在这种情形下，你可能会觉得冲突是一个问题。
Conflict isn’t the problem. 冲突不是问题。
It’s the choice to defuse it rather than use it. 如果我们选择息事宁人而不是善加运用，
That’s the problem. 那才是问题。
S: So today, we’re going to introduce you two magic ingredients 所以今天，我会向大家介绍两种神奇的魔法材料，
that if you use them in conflict situation, it will turn conflict into creativity in an instance. 如果你能在冲突的环境中运用它们，能瞬间把冲突转化为创造力。
So, just a little bit more about us. 现在，我再来稍微介绍一下我们。
Well, we’re a team. 我们是一个团队。
We have been business partners and life partners for over 15 years. 我们作为工作搭档和生活伴侣在一起已经超过15年。
That’s just to say we’ve got into a lot of conflicts. 这就意味着我们碰到过许许多多地冲突。
C: Oh, yeath. 是的
S: And we do conflict very differently. 我们对待冲突的方式完全不同。
We approach it differently. 我们用不同的方式处理冲突。
And we have different styles. 我们有不同的风格。
And…… 然后……
C: We can all agree. 绝对同意
S: What we can’t agree on is I forgot my line. 我们无法达成一致的是我忘记台词了。
What we can’t agree on is…… 我们无法达成一致的是……
C: Conflict 冲突
S: and forgetting your lines is a natural and healthy part in the relationship. 和忘记台词是关系中很自然和健康的部分。
C: Yes, it’s a natural and healthy part but that doesn’t mean I like it. 是的，它是非常自然和健康的，但并不代表我会喜欢它。
Conflict terrifies many people. 冲突会吓到很多人。
And I’ve been one of those people. 我曾经是其中一个。
I grew up with an armcarno father. 我有一个非常严厉的父亲。
As a little person, my Dad was big, loud and scary. 我还是一个小孩子的时候，父亲是一个高大、大嗓门而且有点吓人的人。
And the only thing predictable about him was he’s gonna get upset. 关于他唯一能够预测的事情就是他会突然发脾气。
So every night at dinner, it was like running the gun, and hoping him wouldn’t explode up. 所以每天晚上吃饭的时候，我们都好像在把玩手枪，期待他不会突然爆发。
One night, when we’re staying in Georgia, we lived in an old store house with a big kitchen, white kitchen, red curtains over the sake. 有一天晚上，我们住在乔治亚州的一个老旧的库房里，那里有一个白色的厨房，很大，还挂着红色的窗帘。
We’re all sitting in front of the table 我们都坐在桌子前面，
My dad was across to me. 父亲就坐在我对面。
They were making fun of one of my teachers. 他们在开我一个老师的玩笑。
I was thirteen at that time. 我那时13岁。
I’ve just gone to that place that I’ve had enough. 我突然到了一个点，觉得自己受够了。
So I stirred up 我被激怒，
And I said, 并喊道，
shut up, 闭嘴
shut up, 闭嘴
shut up! 闭嘴
A little louder than that although, 事实上声音要比现在大一些，
I don’t want to blow you guys with the Microphone， 我不想用麦克风震破你们的耳朵。
In a ??? second, my Dad was around the table, 父亲很快从桌子对面走过来，
His hand was on my shirt, 他一把抓起我的衬衫，
And I felt his fist on my face, 用拳头打在我的脸上。
It was a terrifying moment, 那是一个极其恐怖的时刻，
I froze. 我僵住了。
He kept punching. 他不停地挥舞拳头。
My sister finally pulled him off. 我的姐姐最终把他拉开。
And I fell to the floor. 我摔在地板上， In a puddle of my own pee, 瘫倒在自己的一滩尿里。
That was a life-changing traumatic event for me 对我来说，那是一个改变一生的创伤性事件
I decided then and there 就在那个时刻，我意识到
Wow, it is not safe, and it is too dangerous, 天啊，这一点都不安全，太危险了，
I’m not gonna be vulnerable and say how I really feel. 我不会再呈现自己的脆弱，说出我的真实感受，
or show my emotions or my anger. 或是呈现情绪或愤怒，
No way, my body made a decision. 不可能，我的身体做了一个决定。
Anytime when there is disagreement, it flooded with fear. 每次当出现不同意见时，我都能感觉到那种恐惧。
I started actually seek safety by tracking and managing my external environment, all the people around me. 我开始通过观察和控制周围的环境和所有的人来寻求安全感。
So if there’s any tension in the environment, 所以当我嗅到空气中有紧张的气息时，
I would ask question, 我会开始问问题，
or change the subject， 或是转换话题，
or rephrase somebody’s inflammatory comments so the other person can hear better. 或是重新组织语言，让那些尖锐不舒服的评论听起来更容易接受。
I made sure to nod, smile and make eye contact. 我总是在点头，微笑和人保持眼神连接。
But I took a step further. 但是我又进了一步，
Cause I wanted to make sure those power people in my life that they were happy. 因为我想确保身边的权威开心，
So I decided I want to focus on what they wanted me to become, 所以我决定把焦点放在他们期待我怎么做上面，
And I’ll do that. 然后我会照做。
So I wasn’t a C or D student, I went getting all As. 我绝对不会是那种C或D等的学生，我要拿所有的A。
I was an athlete, I went all way to focus on Olympics. 我是运动员，一直聚焦在角逐奥运会上面。
I was a Boeing flight test engineer, the most martural part of Boeing. 我是波音公司的测试工程师，波音公司最重要的一个部分。
This is not an engineer. 可是我不仅仅是一个工程师。
I wound up at a top 5 consulting firm. 我到一家排名前五的咨询公司做咨询工作。
Ironically, my expertise at that consulting firm, facilitating tough conversations. 讽刺的是，我在那家咨询公司的专职工作是协调那些挑战的沟通对话。
No surprise, I spent ten thousands of hours running around my dinning room table defusing tension. 所以不奇怪的是，我花了成千上万个小时在餐桌旁平息冲突，缓和气氛。
I become a professional conflict avoider, 我变成了一个非常专业的和事佬，
Facilitating conversations but never really showing up in them. 协调对话，化解冲突，但是从来不会呈现真实的自己。
I looked good on the outside. 我看起来外表光鲜，
I was terrified on the inside. 内心却惶恐不安。
I felt like a froken fraud. 我觉得自己像一个骗子。
Then I met Susan Clark. 后来我遇到了苏珊●克拉克
I saw her work with a group in conflict, 我看到她处理冲突中的团体，
but she did completely different than I did 但是她的工作方法和我完全不同
I mean she had opinion, 她有自己的主见，
she was passionate 充满热情，
I was like, “oh my god.” 我非常吃惊，“天啊！”
I wanted to do that. 我也想那样做！
I’ll let her tell you about her. 我会让她来自己介绍自己。
S: For me, surfacing conflict saved my life. 对我来说，让冲突浮出水面救了我一命。
When I was twenty-three 我23岁的时候，
I had my dreamed joy. 有一份梦想中的工作
I was teaching 我那时在教书
Life was good 生活过得不错
And then I got sick 后来我生病了
I started to lose weight 我的体重开始下降
I couldn’t keep any food down 我开始吃不下东西
I had no energy 变得很虚弱
I ended up in hospital 后来不得不去医院
And the doctor kept asking me over and over about my past 医生不断地追问我过去的事情
They kept wanting to know about my past 他们想知道我过去发生了什么
I kept saying I had a healthy, happy childhood. 我不断地告诉他们我拥有一个健康和快乐的童年。
Well, apparently, there was a difference between what I was saying on the outside and what they were saying on the inside. 很显然，我说出来的和他们看到的并不一样。
They were seeing a lot of evidence of scarring and sexual trauma 他们看到了很多的伤疤和性创伤证据
Basically what they said to me is you need to get some answers 基本上，他们会建议我说，你需要去寻找答案
You need to go and ask your family some questions 你需要去问问你的家人发生了什么
Or maybe go to see a psychiatrist 或是去看精神科医生
Well, I did 于是，我照做了
And it was like opening Pandora's Box 那个过程像是打开了潘多拉的盒子
All a sudden, my happy, healthy childhood became a nightmare. 突然之间，我那个健康快乐的童年变成了一场噩梦
I started to remember these horrible, violent acts 我开始记起那些恐怖的暴力行为
Mostly at the hands of a charismatic camp director who know one 施暴者是一个当地知名人士
Including my family want to wrap???? that image. 所有的人，包括我的家人都想拼命的掩盖这件事情，保全那个人的形象。
Well, my life depended on it 但是我要活下来
So I kept going 所以我要继续往下探索
I went back to my doctors 我回到了医生那里
They now have resolved the conflict from the past 现在他们解决了过往的冲突
So they were able to diagnose me in the present 就可以对我进行当下的诊断了
They diagnose me with stage 4 ???? 他们确诊的结果是我患了4期肺癌
You might be thinking that sucks. 也许你会觉得这样的结果太糟糕了
Actually, believe it or not, it that moment, it was sort of relief. 事实上，不管你是否相信，在那个时刻，我反而有一种放松的感觉。
Suddenly, I had something I had to focus on. 突然之间，我可以专注地面对一些事情。
The treatments were distracting me from these crazy memories and the conflicts in my family 治疗让我从那些疯狂的记忆和家庭矛盾中解脱出来
And that was actually good. 这对我来说还不错
Until the treatment stopped working 直到有一天治疗失败了
I can still remember the day well 我还清楚地记得那一天
When I sat across from my doctor 我跟医生面对面坐着
She said to me，“We don’t have any more options” 她对我说，“我们已经没有其他可用的方案了”
“You have about 6 months to live” “你大概还可以活6个月”
Suddenly, I found myself with this dying body, 突然之间，我发现自己只剩下这个快要死去的身体，
and these crazy ass memories that no one was really validating or acknowledging, 和那些无法证实，无人认可的疯狂而痛苦的回忆.
And I realized I was at a critical choice moment, 我意识到我到了一个至关重要的抉择点，
I could quit, which actually really frankly seems like best at best at that moment 我可以退出，而且在那个时候这看起来是最好的选择
I could keep fighting with my family, with my doctors, with my old memories. 我可以继续战斗，对抗我的家人，对抗医生，对抗那些记忆
Or I can get curious. 或者是，我可以带着一颗好奇心前行
Well, that led me to the Haven. 最终，它带我来到了海文学院
I ran into a program that called“Come Alive” 我参加了一个叫做“潜力苏醒”的课程。
And it was there that I discovered the amazing energy source, 就是在那里，我发现了一个神奇的能量源泉
the aliveness that really comes from really surfacing, 我的生命活力开始浮现出来
dealing with and using conflict. 面对并且巧妙地运用冲突
I won’t kid you 我不是在开玩笑
It was help 它帮了我
But, that experience of surfacing the conflict changed my life. 但是，把冲突带出水面的经验改变了我的生活， And saved my life. 拯救了我的生命。
C: So you just heard our very personal stories 你们刚刚听到的是我们非常个人化的故事
which we don’t tell all the time 我们并不会经常谈及这些经历
And I want you to think about your story 我想邀请你们想想自己的故事
What you learned from conflict growing up 你在成长过程里从冲突中学到了什么
Now think of a team you’re on now or a significant relationship 想想你现在所在的团队，或是一段重要的关系，
How do you deal with conflict today？ 你是如何处理冲突的？
Conflict wasn’t good or bad 冲突没有好坏
But I’m not kidding you 但是，我不是在开玩笑
You’re not crazy 你也没疯
It’s hard and uncomfortable 它的确很困难，而且让人感到不舒服
That because our nerve system gets fired 那是因为我们的神经系统被触发
And we go into a fight, flight, or freeze 进入到一种战斗、逃跑或僵住的模式中
We all have our personal triggers 我们每个人都有自己的引爆点
Mine is anybody’s getting upset in the environment 我的是当周围的人开始生气的时候， And I get really anxious 我开始变得异常焦虑
My body floods with fear and I want to run 我的身体里充满了恐惧，我只想逃走
Well, mine is if I’m around people who are really nice and polite 如果我身边的人非常体贴、有礼貌，
And not saying stuff, 而且不会说什么难听的，
I actually start to think they are up to something dangerous. 我反而会想他们是不是不怀好意。
I go to fight 我开始进入战斗模式
I got into a little trouble. 我有点小麻烦了
The question I had asked and you may want to ask is 所以我刚刚问的问题，也许也是你要问的问题，
Do I want to let me nerve system control me and limit me 我会允许我的神经系统控制我，限制我吗？
S：You probably are wondering why are we talking about all those personal stuffs. 你也许会很疑惑，为什么我们要谈这些非常个人化的事情?
How do these fit in with business teams? 它们与商业团队又有什么关系？
Well, business is personal 商业都是由人组成的，
And we still have business to do 我们也有自己的生意要做
So cute Lego Movie 就像那部可爱的乐高大电影
C: Because this is what people think a team gonna be like. 因为人们都认为团队应该是这样的
Everything is awesome 一切都棒极了
Everything is cool when you’re part of a team 当你是团队一员时，一切都酷毙了
Everything is awesome 一切都棒极了
C: Thank you! Thank you! 谢谢！谢谢！
That’s not what happens really 那可不是真实的情况
No, what’s really happen on a team is you do start out with an awesome vision. 不是这样，团队中的真实情况是开始的时候你拥有很棒的愿景
Great! 好极了！
So you get some smart people. 那些聪明有才干的人来到你身边
And they are passionate about your course. 他们对于你的目标和方向充满热情
All a sudden, these smart people, start to have very different opinions 突然之间，这些聪明的成员之间开始产生完全不同的意见
And then those different opinions come with strong emotions 随后这些不同的意见带来强烈的情绪
Cos they’ve got a lot of passion 他们拥有如此之多的激情
And you’re stuck in I’m right and you’re wrong 却执着于我对你错的观念之中
We are smashed at the conflict 陷入冲突无法自拔 Now we don’t like conflict 可是我们不喜欢冲突
So most people choose to defuse it 所以大部分人会选择息事宁人
And it could be, if you have a style like me, 所以可能的结果是，如果你跟我是一样的风格，
Okay, we’ll do it your way. 好吧，好吧，那就听你的吧。
A peace-keeper style. 这是和事佬的风格
Or it could be I’m gonna take charge 也有可能是这样的，我来控制局面
I’m gonna do it my way 我会坚持我的方式
You guys are gonna thank me when I get it done. 等我把事情搞定了，你们等着说谢谢吧！
It could be, hey, I’m at here until you guys get done of those messy stuffs then I’ll come back and do some real work. 也可能是，嘿，我会在这里等你们收拾完烂摊子，再开始干点“正事”！
S: So when teams do this, they stop 所以当团队发生这种情况的时候，就会停滞不前。
People get disengaged. 大家开始失去积极性
Worse, they start to undermine each other 更糟糕的是，人们开始互相搞破坏
The team like this don’t get great result ???? 这样的团队绝对无法取得良好的成效
This is disengagement. 这就是消极倦怠
People are not using conflict 人们没有积极地运用冲突
They are avoiding it or defusing it. 而是试图逃避冲突或是息事宁人
C: Here’s some data from Gallup 这是一组来自盖洛普的调查数据
They are talking about different engagement levels 它说的是不同的参与程度
S: So look at me when you see this. 大家看我这里，当你看到这个数字时，
One third of the company is usually disengaged. 公司里往往只有三分之一的人是积极参与的。
Let’s just talked about that 70.5% 让我们来看看其他的70.5%
Because they are actively disengaged 因为他们主动选择不参与的。 That’s sort of unpleasant or something bad going on there. 它看起来一点都不令人愉快，这背后应该有一些糟糕的事情在发生。
Those people, something goes on for them, 这些人都碰到了某些状况
They are very dissatisfied with where they are 他们对自己的处境都非常地不满意
C: We do think this is disengagement because people are not dealing with surfacing conflict. 我们认为这是一种消极倦怠的状态，因为大家没有有效处理出现的冲突。
So we want to talk with you about two magic ingredients. 我们想向大家介绍两种的“魔法原料“
that actually transfers conflicts into activities in an instant 它们能够瞬间把冲突转化为创造力
They are vulnerability and curiosity 它们是”脆弱”和”好奇心”
So the first magic ingredient is Vulnerability. 第一种魔法原料是“脆弱“
I don’t know anybody who actually likes the concept of Vulnerability except maybe Branny Brown 我不知道除了布兰妮.布朗之外，是不是有人真的会喜欢脆弱的概念
But in business, you’ve got to be kidding 而这在商业之中简直是在开玩笑
Business is a room of invincibility 商场是没有硝烟的战场
But we’re talking about on a team, where relationship matters and vulnerability is a key. 但是我们讨论的是团队，团队中关系是重要的，而脆弱则是解决之道。
Vulnerability is not about being weak 脆弱并不意味着软弱
Vulnerability is the willingness to expose oneself to danger 脆弱是一种愿意敞开面对危险的意愿
To take a risk and be honest about what’s really happening 敢于冒险，对真实的发生保持诚实
To say what you think, feel and want 勇敢地说出你想到的，感受到的和想要的
I’ve got to tell you, I do not like this concept at all 我想要诚实地告诉你，我自己一点都不喜欢这个概念
I still say, God, why do I have to be vulnerable? 我还是会说，天啊，我为什么非要呈现脆弱？
S: Should I tell them you were actually arguing about it an hour ago? 我应不应该告诉大家你一个小时之前还在跟我争辩这个问题？
She wanted me to take this part. 她想要让我删掉这部分
But the benefit is, when I have the courage to actually stand up and say what I really think, feel and want, even share my anger 但是好处是，当我真的有勇气站起来说出我的所想，所感和所求，有时甚至是分享愤怒，
Which wasn’t really going well earlier in my life, 虽然我生命早期的经验很糟糕，
I actually stop managing you guys, 我开始停止控制你们，
I land inside my own shoes and I connect from there, 我回到自己的中心，并从那里开始连接，
And I re-claim more of me, my voice, my emotion and creative expression 我重新认领自己，包括我的声音、我的情绪，并用一种有创造力的方式进行表达。
I’m actually pretty good in conflict these days. 现在，我对冲突越来越能够坦然面对了。
S： I’m going to ??? for that 我能够证明这一点
Let’s talk about the second ingredient - curiosity. 让我们来谈谈第二个原料——好奇心
So what curiosity doesn’t mean? It’s letting go of my judgments. 那么好奇心意味不能做什么呢？要放下评判
I often hear people say to me, I don’t want to be judgmental. 我经常听到人们说，我不想妄下结论
Really? 这是真的吗？
Your judgments, your ability to decern, to imagine, that’s one of your greatest gifts. 你的评判、你的辨识力和想象力是你最大的礼物。
You want smart and opinionated people on your team 你希望你团队里的人都聪明而有主见，
You hire them for that 这是你雇佣他们的原因
The problem isn’t our judgments. 问题不是我们的评判，
The problem is that we get stuck to them. 而是我们被评判卡住了
We got married to and attached to them 我们过于执着和坚持自己的评判
We think we’re right 我们认为自己是对的
I do this all the time 我一直以来都是这么做的
I know this one 我对这个再熟悉不过了
C：She does 插话：她的确是这样的
And this is very sticky 事情变得很棘手
What curiosity does mean is the willingness to own my judgments 好奇心的真正含义是承认我是有评判的
And get interested and curious about the different perspective. 然后再对不同的观点抱持一种感兴趣和好奇的态度
To be willing to consider there’s more than one right way, more than one truth, more than one possibility. 愿意考虑也许会有不同的方案，不同的真相和不同的可能性
And get over my need to be right. 超越我必须正确的需求
Now for me, that meant I had to get curious about cancer 回到我身上，这就意味着我必须要对癌症保持好奇心
I had to consider the cancer wasn’t just an enemy 我必须考虑到癌症并不仅仅是一个敌人
There was something for me to learn from it. 一定有些功课是我需要从癌症中学习的
I had to get curious about those memories and couldn’t just bury them down 我要对那些曾经的回忆保持好奇，而不是干脆把它们埋掉。
And I even had to get curious about the difference between my storyline about the past and my family’s 我甚至还要对家人保持好奇心，因为对于过去，我们有不同的故事版本
C: So when you combine curiosity and vulnerability in the middle of the conflict 所以当你能够在冲突中运用好奇心和脆弱这两种原料时，
That’s when you start to use the energy of conflict rather than defuse it. 你就开始运用冲突的能量，而不是简单地息事宁人
S: So let’s give you a business case scenario of this 我们会给你一个关于这种情况的商业案例
We’re working with an IT company and they’re pretty successful 我们在为一家IT公司做咨询，那是一家相当成功的公司。
They are successful enough and they were able to buy, get…. 他们如此成功，所以能够购买，得到……
C: acquire 收购
S: Acquire, that’s the word I’m looking for 收购，是的，我正想说这个词
Acquire a smaller company 收购了一家小型公司
And with that acquisition, Jane, the present of the smaller company, got planted on the executive team 做为收购内容之一，这家小公司的总经理，简，被安插进管理团队。
Now in three months of this new deal, the CEO Frank of the IT company called us, 收购三个月之后，IT公司的CEO弗兰克打电话给我们。
I’m pretty sure that he just wanted us to help him to fire Jane. 我确信他只是希望我们协助他开掉简。
We came in. 于是我们就进入他们的团队
We started to work with them over two day period 开始进行一次为期两天的工作
They got to the part where they were talking about their strategy 然后他们开始谈起他们的市场战略
Jane was vehemently opposed to what the team was proposing 简强烈地反对团队的提议
Three of the guys from the exact team got up worse, 反方团队中的三名成员愤怒地站起来
Pointing at her 用手指着她
Screaming at her 朝她大喊大叫 I actually thought we’re going to have a real medical doctor. 我当时真的以为我们可能需要一个急救医生
I was a little concerned. 我有点担心。
Then we said time’s up 然后我们说，时间到！
Do you remember vulnerability and curiosity? 你们还记得脆弱和好奇心吗？
One of the guys, 其中的一个人
One of the really angry guys said, 刚刚非常愤怒的男人中的一个，说，
In an angry voice, but he started there, 语气中带着愤怒，但他还是开始做了尝试，
Look, Okay, I’m gonna be vulnerable, 好吧，听着，我要呈现我的脆弱，
I’m gonna tell you, 我要告诉你
I’ve been angry and frustrated with you since you join this team. 自从你加入这个团队的那一刻起，我就对你感到愤怒和失望
And I really haven’t listened to anything you’ve said 其实你说的话我一句都没听进去
Then he said, and , because of curiosity, I actually wanted to try to 然后他说，出于好奇，我的确想要试试，
He walked over and sat next to Jane. 于是他走过去，坐到简旁边
Now Jane took a breath, 简做了一次深呼吸，
And said, ”this has been really hard” 说道，“这的确非常困难，” But then she launched her idea 但是之后她开始分享自己的想法
You could see light bulbs go off 于是警报讯号消除了
Joe and the rest of the team knew she had good ideas 团队中的其他成员都知道她有好点子
They stepped back and redesign their entire strategy to include Jane’s idea. 他们不再咄咄逼人，而是重新设计了整个战略规划，并接纳了简的想法。
That new strategy took them incredible result of No. 3 spot in the industry. 新的战略规划带给他们意想不到的收获，他们在行业中稳居三甲。
C: So we found it all the time in team highly capable people can’t work together. 我们经常在团队中发现这种情况，有能力的人却无法好好合作。
It is our job to help bring them together 我们的工作就是把他们整合到一起，
And recognize that my way and your way, it’s a whole new way. 并了解到我的方法，加上你的方法，会是一种全新的方法。
Teams and relationships that do this, that utilize vulnerability and curiosity come up with innovative solutions not just once but repeatedly. 那些运用了脆弱和好奇心的团队和关系都会一次又一次地产生卓越的创新成效
They bounce back from and set back from failure 他们能够迅速地从失败中恢复活力，
People are involved, engaged and alive. 大家都积极参与并充满活力。
So I want to take you back to when I had just 6 months to live 现在我要把大家带回刚刚的话题，我只剩下6个月可以活
To the last morning of that come alive. 回到那个《潜力苏醒》的最后一个早晨
It was a transformative moment for me 对我来说那是一个蜕变性的时刻
The leader of the workshop wanted to do a healing circle for me 工作坊的导师想要为我做一个疗愈圈，
……
And they invited their friend Father Jack Romankemists prays
Now when he walked in the room in his ropes all has bruklers Brucler
There were some people in that room that had pretty serious religious issues with organized religion.
That loving, kind healing circle 本来应该充满爱和善意的疗愈圈
chaos, mayhem 变成了一团混乱
It was not pretty. 一点都不美好
Until Father Jack said something, 直到杰克神父开始说了一些话，
He got vulnerable, 他开始呈现脆弱，
he said, “you know, I realize I’m representing the church” 他说：“你知道，我意识到我代表着整个教堂”
“And I had made some mistakes.” “而我犯过一些错。”
“My church had made some mistakes” “我的教堂了犯过一些错误”
And he got curious. 然后他开始变得好奇。
He said, “I’m interested in hearing from you.” 他说：“我很感兴趣听你们说。“ Suddenly, it got very real. 突然之间，一切变得如此真实。
Very quickly, it was a changing moment, 很快地，它变成了一个转化性的时刻。
Because I’ve never seen conflict got dealt with like that 因为我从来没有见过冲突可以像这样处理
Some content he got dealt with, with vulnerability and curiosity 他用呈现脆弱和带着好奇的方式处理冲突
As a matter of fact, that was the healing 而事实上，这就是疗愈
I went back and had surgery to remove tumors 我回到了医院，进行移除肿瘤的手术，
They open me up, 他们打开我的身体，
The tumors were gone 肿瘤消失了
Now I really believe that in that moment, that experience being in a situation 现在我真的会相信就是在那个时刻，那个经验，那种情形中,
where there was that kind of conflict and people deal with it differently saved me. 人们处理冲突的不同方式拯救了我
C: So we’ll leave you with this 这是我们最后要留给大家的信息
Conflict is an energy source for innovation, creativity and transformation. 冲突是革新、创造力和蜕变的能量来源
It’s time we stop looking for safety and magic outside of ourselves 是时候停止追求安全感和向外寻找魔法了，
And recognize the resources we have within and between us to bridge our differences 认识到我们的内在和我们之间拥有足够的资源去沟通彼此的差异
And tap that unlimited renewable resource 并连接那取之不尽，用之不竭的资源，
S: So you’re capable of the amazing things 我们拥有非凡的能力
I know the time is going to be up and I’ll wrap this up quickly 我知道时间到了，我会尽快做个总结
You’re capable of the amazing things 我们拥有非凡的能力
So the next time you get stuck in conflicts 所以下次当你发生冲突的时候
Remember, defuse it 记得，平息它
I mean….. 我的意思是……
C: Oh my god, she blows the line. 天啊，她又说出错话了。
S:Okay, we’re going to fight about this later. 好吧，我们等一下再吵！
Use it, don’t defuse it! 运用它，而不是息事宁人！
Because you too can change the world 因为你也能够改变世界
One team, one relationship, one conflict at a time 一次一个团队，一次一个关系，一次一个冲突！
Okay, thank you! 好的，谢谢！ 【更多分享】请点击名称，直接进入： 对你以及你所追求的生命， 致上我们最深的祝福！ |
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