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用轻浅的文字拼接过往的零碎 文/慧子（甘肃） 一直以来，我喜欢用胡言乱语与只言片语拼接那些消散在岁月长河中的云烟，以零散而又轻浅的文字描绘走过的风景，捕捉往昔的点滴。 回忆涌至小学暑假。那时我生活在部队大院。每到暑假，我们一群放假的学生便在军人的义务组织下进行作文比赛。我初次参赛便有幸获得了一等奖，奖品是一个精美的集邮册。自那时起，我便与作文结下了不解之缘，一发不可收拾。后来有了女儿，我便为她记日记，在QQ空间写随笔，用文字调侃生活中的琐事，用情怀感恩爱人和家人带给我的爱，对不满的现实发泄情绪。然而，随着时光流转，QQ号被遗忘，密码也记不得了。再后来有了智能手机，手机备忘录成了我文字的栖息地，可惜手机被盗，那些辛苦写就的“小文”也随之消逝。 就这样，我习惯用简单而质朴的文字记录心情、记录瞬间的感动和收不住的灵感。从最初寥寥几句、几行，到后来一段、一篇小文。想多写便多写些，想少写便少写些。我并非作家，这只是一个业余生活的爱好，是偶尔激动时记下的点滴，所以我只能戏称为“小文”。然而，这些字字句句都是生活中最真实的生活经历和自励的心语。虽无能记录人间的极致与非凡，但用心足以记录下平凡的琐碎和感动。 我的初中语文老师徐老师，个子不高，温和而学识渊博。她是我国“红学会”的成员，专门研究《红楼梦》，对书中每个角色都研究透彻。她曾说过一句令我印象深刻的话：“你写的文章只要能将读者带入其中，让读者跟随你的思路，为你的喜怒哀乐而动容，那么，你写的东西就成功了一大半。”徐老师的话至今铭记于心，也一直指引着我在文字的世界里前行。 每当敲打文字时，我便让自己完全沉浸其中，将时光渲染，将灵魂放空。仿佛能感受到生命被轻轻抚摸，也领略到文字的魅力与张力。更重要的是，灵感让这些文字自由跳跃、肆意摆布，让我嗅到文字那宽广而浑厚的气息。 半生已过，一路走来，一路读，一路思，一路听，一路写。有时在精神家园踽踽独行，或有欣喜跃然于胸，或沉浸于文字中掩面而泣，一时释怀、一念悲凉、一些无奈、一种凄婉、一怀情绪……更多的是对自己生活的幸福最厚实的诠释！ 这些文字随性、随意、随心，没有博人眼球的别具一格，没有大气磅礴的历史长河，没有与众不同的独具匠心，没有金碧辉煌的庭院楼阁，没有虚幻缥缈的海市蜃楼，没有与时俱进的人云亦云，更没有慷慨激昂的革命口号…… 因为始终认为，记录下来的心路，是给自己看的，是老去路上充满幸福的回忆，只有它懂我瞬间的欣喜，只有它阅尽我刹那的华彩！也唯有用文字将当时的喜悦铺满每一个角落。他人懂了更好，不懂也罢！ 曾经多少次，我翻开这些文字，浏览成型的小文，感动着自己，震撼着自己。每一篇用心用情用爱的文字，承载了一路欢歌一路情，一路风雨一程心的解读。多少次，我折服于自己，仰望自己，问自己：这些灵感来自哪里？这些文字从何而来？我怎么就写得如此精彩呢？这些美丽的辞藻把莫名的灵感怎么形容的如此美妙美肖？多少次，我问自己：如果现在重新再写，还能把情感融入其中吗，还能让刹那捡起它涌泉般的温柔吗？ 我知道答案必定是否定的！ 望着这些走心的话语，每次看都让我无法释怀，难以割舍。心中要表达的情在此停留，虽刹那，却成芳华；虽突发，却成永痕；虽羞涩，却成精湛。原来，在我自制的风景路上，这里的风景独好！ 一路写，心在追逐，匆匆间也曾停歇。我知道那是笔滞浓情无力行，毕竟水平有限，往往捉襟见肘。但还是坚持用文字爱好着我的爱好，打发寂寞，抒发情怀，填补空间，挥舞灵感，在文字里自由徜徉，沉淀于烟火生活，像对自己诉说，也让自己聆听。哈哈，开心！因为在这段独有的风景里，流淌着我曾经的美好时光。 让我感激和感动的是，每篇文章公开后，许多朋友都会送上金句点评，有的送花，有的送来大拇指。我知道，每一个留言点评都是对文章的浓缩和精华再现。有的朋友看到喜欢的，还会转发收藏。这一切让我对自己的文字有了更高要求，也有了坚持写下去的动力。 回首往事，往事如烟，但有用文字记录下来的往事，却把情留了下来。我想，这应该是对时光和自己最好的馈赠吧！ 一直以来，我对岁月充满向往，对未来充满期盼。一次次渴望，一次次远行，一次次将自己的梦与幻想放置在行进的路途之中。于是，用文字、用自己近期的照片，组合成独特的方式为自己未来的时光送上一份装满真情的礼物。里面有爱的记录，有爱人、孩子、家人，有父母、兄弟姊妹，哪怕只是自己；里面有温暖的关怀，一句问候，一个微笑，一个背影，哪怕只是一个不经意的回眸；里面有伤悲，有离去，哪怕只是一次短暂的分开；里面有相遇，有朋友，有四季，有花开，有叶落，有风声，有雨落，哪怕是一次残缺不全的梦境；里面有不期而遇时的激动，有分手后的触动，哪怕是不如见一面的冲动；里面有童年，有同学、同事，哪怕是一次不太惬意的相聚；里面有我对部队大院的回忆和情感，哪怕是回大院的路多么遥远；里面有对父亲的敬仰，有父亲遇见伟人的荣耀，有我家军人家庭情节的抒发，哪怕是摘抄父亲的回忆录；里面有好友的摄影，有朋友的诗歌，有他人精彩的名言，哪怕是自己蹩脚的一句不成型的歪诗；里面有照片的联想，有嘉峪关城楼的壮美、有喀秋莎的风姿、有滇池湖畔的梦境、哪怕是夕阳西下半生归来依旧青春的风采…… 一次次独坐文字的空间，一次次让情愫放逐于笔墨行间，让岁月走向过往，让过往成为传说，让传说成为神话。不管成为什么，我还是希望用薄薄的记忆，随着远去的微风，生出细腻动人的传说……想把笑声弥漫在岁月里，把不幸放在过往的云烟里，努力把记忆中最美的光阴放在离时间最近的地方；只想让曾经的时光中有触笔时的笑声和感动，一直都有……我是一个简单而纯粹的人，因为简单，觉得满足，因为简单，觉得幸福。 如今，新春开始，我再次用破碎的文字拼接我的简单，用简单的言语延续我的满足，用满足的快乐记录我的零碎，用零碎的心思描绘我的风景，用风景的魅惑享受我的清欢！ 我一直在路上，踏实从容的用文字零零碎碎的拼凑，迈出的每一步都是心之所向。偶尔停下踟蹰的脚步，四顾茫然，无所从然。走一走，停一停，有时，抓住眼球的风景让我流连忘返，重三道四的像念经的和尚。 不觉已走过半生，走过如歌的岁月，一直珍惜路途中一切美好的遇见。有时遇见一树花开，有时遇见一树叶落，总认为那是自己不曾错过的风景。于是，把这些遇见用心记录下来，因为这些都是最难得的一见。 安静地坐在季节深处，让心情自由游走，捡起零碎的记忆，再用只言片语来拼接，把走过的路拼接成一副美丽的风景。在一个人的时候，在安静的夜里，翻出来看看，再用记忆深处的文字，重温昨日的温馨，在一个角落安放自己的灵魂。 这样的感觉真好！ 他人懂也罢，不懂也罢，唯有自己懂就好！任世间繁华，我独享清欢。如此，便好！  Splicing together the fragments of the past with light and shallow text I have always enjoyed piecing together the clouds and smoke that dissipate in the river of time with nonsense and fragments of words, describing the scenery I have passed through with scattered and light words, capturing the bits and pieces of the past. Memories flood into the summer vacation of elementary school. At that time, I lived in the military compound. Every summer vacation, a group of students who are on vacation organize essay competitions under the voluntary organization of soldiers. I was fortunate enough to win the first prize in my first competition, which was a beautiful stamp album. Since then, I have formed an unbreakable bond with writing, and it has been unstoppable. Later on, when I had a daughter, I kept a diary for her, wrote essays on QQ space, joked about trivial matters in life with words, expressed gratitude to my loved ones and family for the love they brought me, and vented my emotions on the reality of dissatisfaction. However, as time passed, the QQ account was forgotten and the password was also forgotten. Later on, with the advent of smartphones, mobile phone memos became my habitat for writing. Unfortunately, my phone was stolen, and those hard-earned 'little articles' disappeared with it. So, I am accustomed to using simple and plain words to record my emotions, moments of emotion, and uncontrollable inspirations. From a few sentences and lines at the beginning, to a paragraph or a short article later on. If you want to write more, write more; if you want to write less, write less. I am not a writer, it is just a hobby in my spare time, a little bit I occasionally jot down when I am excited, so I can only jokingly call it 'Xiaowen'. However, these words and sentences are the most authentic life experiences and self motivating words in life. Although it may not be able to record the extreme and extraordinary of the human world, dedication is enough to record ordinary trivialities and emotions. My middle school Chinese teacher, Mr. Xu, is not tall, gentle and knowledgeable. She is a member of the 'Red Society' in China, specializing in the study of 'Dream of the Red Chamber' and thoroughly researching every character in the book. She once said a sentence that left a deep impression on me: 'As long as your articles can immerse readers in them, make them follow your ideas, and be moved by your joys and sorrows, then half of what you write has been successful.' Teacher Xu's words are still remembered in my heart and have been guiding me forward in the world of words. Whenever I type words, I immerse myself completely, rendering time and emptying my soul. It seems like one can feel the gentle touch of life and appreciate the charm and tension of words. More importantly, inspiration allows these words to freely jump and manipulate, allowing me to smell the broad and profound aura of words. Half a life has passed, along the way, reading, thinking, listening, and writing. Sometimes walking alone in the spiritual home, there may be joy leaping in the chest, or immersing oneself in words and covering one's face to cry, a moment of relief, a thought of sadness, some helplessness, a kind of melancholy, an emotion... More importantly, it is the most profound interpretation of one's own happiness in life! These words are casual, casual, and free spirited, without eye-catching uniqueness, without a majestic historical river, without unique creativity, without magnificent courtyard buildings, without illusory mirages, without keeping up with the times and following the crowd, and without passionate revolutionary slogans Because I always believe that the recorded emotions are for myself to see, memories filled with happiness on the road to old age, only it understands my momentary joy, only it sees through my momentary brilliance! Only words can fill every corner with the joy of that time. It's better if others understand, it's better if they don't! How many times have I opened these words, browsed through the formed texts, moved and shocked myself. Every heartfelt and loving text carries the interpretation of a journey of joy, emotion, wind, rain, and heart. How many times have I been impressed by myself, looked up at myself, and asked myself: Where do these inspirations come from? Where did these words come from? How did I write so brilliantly? How can these beautiful words describe inexplicable inspiration so beautifully? How many times have I asked myself: If I were to rewrite it now, would I still be able to infuse my emotions into it, and would I be able to pick it up like a gushing spring of tenderness in an instant? I know the answer must be negative! Looking at these heartfelt words, every time I see them, I can't let go and find it hard to let go. The emotions that need to be expressed in the heart linger here, even in an instant, but become beautiful; Although sudden, it has become an eternal mark; Although shy, it has become exquisite. Originally, on my self-made scenic road, the scenery here is unique! Writing all the way, my heart is chasing, and I have also stopped in a hurry. I know it's a case of pen stagnation and emotional exhaustion, as my skills are limited and I often struggle to make ends meet. But I still insist on using words to pursue my hobbies, to pass the loneliness, express emotions, fill the space, wave inspiration, freely wander in words, settle in the fireworks life, like telling myself and letting myself listen. Haha, happy! Because in this unique scenery, there flows the beautiful times I once had. What makes me grateful and moved is that after each article is published, many friends will send golden comments, some will send flowers, and some will send thumbs up. I know that every comment is the concentration and essence reproduction of the article. Some friends even repost and bookmark things they like. All of this has raised my expectations for my writing skills and given me the motivation to keep writing. Looking back on the past, the past is like smoke, but the memories recorded in words have left emotions behind. I think this should be the best gift to time and oneself! I have always been filled with longing for time and anticipation for the future. Time and time again yearning, time and time again traveling, placing one's dreams and fantasies in the path of progress. So, using words and recent photos, I combined them into a unique way to give myself a gift filled with true feelings for my future time. There are records of love inside, including lovers, children, family members, parents, siblings, even if it's just oneself; Inside, there is warm care, a greeting, a smile, a silhouette, even if it's just a casual glance back; There is sadness and departure inside, even if it's just a brief separation; Inside, there are encounters, friends, four seasons, flowers blooming, leaves falling, wind blowing, rain falling, even a fragmented dream;Inside, there is the excitement of unexpected encounters, the impact of a breakup, and even the impulse to meet up; Inside, there is childhood, classmates, colleagues, even if it's just an uncomfortable gathering; Inside, there are my memories and emotions of the military compound, even if the road back to the compound is so far away; Inside, there is admiration for my father, the honor of meeting a great man, and the expression of the plot of my military family, even if it is excerpted from my father's memoirs; Inside, there are photos by friends, poems by friends, wonderful quotes from others, even if it's just one of my own awkward and distorted lines; There are associations with photos inside, such as the magnificence of Jiayuguan City Tower, the charm of Katyusha, the dream of Dianchi Lake, and the youthful charm even after half a life at sunset Sitting alone in the space of words time and time again, allowing emotions to be exiled between the lines of brush and ink, letting time pass, making the past a legend, and making legends a myth. No matter what I become, I still hope to use thin memories to create delicate and touching legends with the distant breeze... I want to spread laughter in the years, put misfortune in the clouds and smoke of the past, and strive to put the most beautiful time in my memory in the place closest to time; I just want to have the laughter and emotion of touching the pen in the past time, always have... I am a simple and pure person, because of simplicity, I feel satisfied, and because of simplicity, I feel happy. Now, as the Chinese New Year begins, I am once again piecing together my simplicity with broken words, continuing my satisfaction with simple words, recording my fragments with the joy of satisfaction, depicting my scenery with fragmented thoughts, and enjoying my joy with the charm of scenery! I have been on the road, calmly piecing together fragmented words, and every step I take is the direction of my heart. Occasionally stopping their unsteady steps, looking around in confusion, feeling helpless. Walking and stopping, sometimes the eye-catching scenery makes me linger, like a monk reciting scriptures. Unconsciously, half of my life has passed, like a song, and I have always cherished all the beautiful encounters along the way. Sometimes I encounter a tree blooming, sometimes I encounter a tree with fallen leaves, always thinking that it is a scenery I have never missed. So, record these encounters with care, because they are the most rare encounters. Sitting quietly in the depths of the season, letting your emotions wander freely, picking up fragmented memories, and then piecing together words and phrases to create a beautiful scenery. When alone, in the quiet night, take a look and use the words from deep memory to relive the warmth of yesterday, and place your soul in a corner. This feeling is really good! Whether others understand or not, only oneself can understand! Amidst the hustle and bustle of the world, I enjoy pure joy alone. That's good! |
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