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喜剧人、作家、演员黄阿丽回归网飞，推出了她的第三部原创喜剧特辑 《黄艾丽：风流女子》，一如既往地敢想敢说还敢在情人节上线，用屎尿屁解构了真实的不平等的两性关系。Don 指大佬，而 Don Juan 唐璜是文学史上鼎鼎有名的风流人物，也是花花公子的代名词，这位自信发光的女王用 Don Wong 大大方方地把大佬与风流兼得的野心展示出来嘿嘿~
#1 And I have to say that as a working mother of two… getting to take a drug-induced nap for an hour… was well worth having a news crew up my butt. 不得不说，作为一个有俩孩子的职业母亲… 能在麻醉药劲之下打一小时的盹儿… 就算菊花被爆 也算值得了
一个职业母亲有多疲惫？能在麻药劲儿下睡一个小时就是奢侈。 working mother 职业母亲，与之对应的全职母亲用 full-time mother 或 stay-at-home mom 表示。 我还查了一下全麻是一种什么体验？医生的回答如下： 如果用全身麻醉让人睡觉，然后不对您做任何伤害的刺激，这样会睡的非常香，起来以后会觉得非常舒服。 就，忽然好想试一试（bushi #2 You're too scared to ask your wife for alone time, so instead you just passively-aggressively take itby chasing your wife and kids out of the bathroom with the stank of your selfish-ass shit!你不敢向妻子要求独处的时间，所以你就消极应对用你那坨自私的臭屎把妻子和孩子赶出厕所！
一个丈夫/父亲可以多自在？能在全家最忙碌的早晨独自占用卫生间不紧不慢地拉半个小时屎~ stank 是 stink 的过去式，意为臭的、恶心的，selfish-ass 自私鬼，passive-aggressive behavior 消极抵抗的行为，一连串令人讨厌的行为构筑起男性的“自由”。 #3 And I panicked. I was like, "I don't know if I can make it in this world on my own.""So I better trap this dude who graduated from Harvard Business School so that I don't end up homeless."But now, I know that I can make it on my own.我慌了，我心想：“我不知道我能不能自己一个人活下去”“所以我最好抓住这个从哈佛商学院毕业的家伙，这样我就不会无家可归了”但是现在，我知道我可以靠自己活下去了
现代女性已经越来越清醒地认识到靠谁不如靠自己的真理。也是我最喜欢的一句台词！ I can make it 我能做到，我能成功。I can make it on my own. 我能靠自己活下去，能靠自己成功。 #4 Generally, our society is very unforgiving of women who cheat on their husbands,and at the same time, it's so forgiving of men who cheat on their wives.一般来说 我们的社会对背叛丈夫的女性是非常不宽容的与此同时，对背叛妻子的男人却是如此的宽容
凭什么男性出轨就会有无数的理由为他辩驳这是他应得的，而女性即便有出轨的想法也不被世俗容忍呢？ cheat on 对丈夫或妻子不忠 She found out that he'd been cheating on her. 她发现他对她不忠。 #5 For women, no matter how much money, power, or respect you earn,you are never allowed to behave badly and get away with it.对女人来说 无论你有多少金钱、权力、赢得多少尊重你都休想行为不端却没有后果
成功男士可以约会数不清的美女模特（谁躺枪了我不说），而顶尖的单口相声女演员却只能约会三流的魔术师。你看，同样是成功人士，男女的择偶差距却大得可笑。 get away with sth. 躲开了某事，也就是做错事却不被惩罚。 If I thought I could get away with it, I wouldn't pay my taxes at all. 如果我认为逃税可以不受处罚的话，我就干脆一分钱都不交了。 #6 I want to have it all.I want to have a family, a career, and a side piece.我全都想占有我想要家庭，想要事业，也想要小奶狗
a side piece 正常交往之外的情人、情妇，也可以说 side thing. Does she know about your side ting? 她知道你出轨了吗？ #7 I don't just want equal pay, I want equal pleasure.我不仅想要同工同酬，我还想要同等的性福
equal pay 同等的报酬，equal pay for equal work 同工同酬，equal pleasure 结合了前面说的择偶范围和小奶狗等，翻译为同等的性福，绝妙~ 别说黄姐，谁不想要呢？女性因为性别遭遇的薪酬歧视、外貌歧视、婚恋歧视、能力歧视等等，普遍到大家误以为从来如此便就是对。但段子同样可以照进现实，承认不足才有可能进步（是谁被Cue了我也不说
#8 Do you know how much more successful I would be if I had a wife?你知道如果我有老婆，我会多成功吗？
“一个成功男人的背后总有一个默默付出的女人”女性曾被这句话蒙蔽了很久，忘记了自己就可以做成很多事情，当女性不再忙于服务丈夫时将会有多大的发展空间呢？ #9 He doesn't give a shit about what I say on stage because he's too busy living the life I wanted for myself.他根本不在乎我在台上说什么，因为他正忙着过我自己想过的生活
give a shit 可以理解为不在乎、管他呢，允许妻子做自己的好丈夫其实根本就不在乎她说了什么，还过上了妻子梦想中的生活。 #10 I'm the one leaning in while he is lying down.当他躺平的时候 我正在拼搏
lie down 躺平，lean in 体育运动里身体重心前移或移向某人某物，进而引申为前进之意。 leaning in 与 lying down 押了头韵，妻子打拼赚钱的时候，丈夫躺平享受生活。 以上就是我总结的十句经典台词，如果你有喜欢的台词不妨在评论区告诉我吧~ ｜本文作者：枫叶依蓝 |
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